Paying for things using mobile apps is becoming more and more common in many countries. Does this development have more advantages or disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

Using mobile
apps
instead
of paying in cash has been more popular in several countries.
This
trend, despite the benefit of
money
management
, brings a greater disadvantage for society as a whole in terms of affecting citizens’ privacy
information
. As one of the positive aspects, utilizing mobile
apps
makes
money
management
simple due to the function of recording revenue and expenditure for each
payment
automatically.
For example
, according to the recent survey, 60% of individuals who installed and relied on
payment
apps
answered that automatic records that are
trace
Add an article
a trace
the trace
show examples
of
money
movement on the
apps
were useful for
management
Add an article
the management
show examples
of their total
money
. If
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
mobile
apps
for
payment
were not invented,
people
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
worldwide would not be able to manage their
money
as
much
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
easily as
contemporary
Add an article
the contemporary
a contemporary
show examples
world.
On the other hand
, it can be recognized as a negative shift in view of involving
people
in a crime. There is a high possibility for
people
to be exposed to privacy invasions through registered personal
information
on the
payment
apps
. To illustrate
this
, the public organization showed that 90% of users of
such
apps
have a possibility to be theft
information
of bank account without
applied
Wrong verb form
applying
show examples
a specific soft for
protection
Replace the word
protecting
show examples
their
information
to their devices. If
greater
Add an article
a greater
show examples
number of
people
take
opportunity
Add an article
the opportunity
show examples
to pay in mobile
apps
, the figure for the crime recognized as privacy theft will increase significantly. In conclusion,
although
the
payment
with using mobile
apps
is beneficial for
money
management
, there is
more
Add an article
a more
the more
show examples
harmful effect in the increased crime which leads to the theft of personal
information
.
Submitted by 100nami.d on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: