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Band 5

Some people believe that the experiences children have before they go to school will have the greatest effect on their future. Others argue that experiences gained when they are teenagers have a bigger influence. Discuss both views and give opinion.

#people #experiences #children #school #effect #future #teenagers #influence
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Some
people
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 opine that prior to schooling the
experiences
Use synonyms
 gained by
children
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 have a significant impression on their
future
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 whereas others deny
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the fact that
experiences
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 of
teen
Correct your spelling
teenage
show examples
age
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 have
major
Add an article
a major
show examples
 influence. I vehemently espouse that
experiences
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 of
teenager
Replace the word
teenage
show examples
children
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 have more important than
Use synonyms
pre
Correct your spelling
preschool
show examples
school
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experiences
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 because at
this
Linking Words
age
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children
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 start to think wisely about
experiences
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. As these viewpoints require prudent elaboration, let us delve deeper into them along with my own opinion with pertinent examples in the impending paragraphs.
To begin
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 with, a large number of
people
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 are in favour of the importance of
experiences
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 of
children
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 prior to
school
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education
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 in their
future
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lives
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 because there are numerous reasons behind
this
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.
First
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 and foremost, before starting
the
Correct article usage
apply
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school
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education
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,
children
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 may get a vast experience from their
parents
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. To elaborate, as
parents
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 play an indispensable part in
childrens’
Correct your spelling
children's
show examples
lives
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,
children
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 at home prior to
education
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 may like to follow their
Use synonyms
parents
Change to a genitive case
parent's
parents'
show examples
 activities and
experiences
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 so they may learn many things like how to deal with others and how to eat properly.
As a result
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, not only do
experiences
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 of
this
Linking Words
age
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 assist a lot a child to behave well in
future
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, but they
also
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 revise these prior to
school
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 experience with the help of their
parents
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. To cite an example,
Ms.
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Ms
show examples
 Katharine Viner, the editor-in-chief of The Guardian newspaper, in her editorial ‘Pragmatic effects of
Use synonyms
pre
Correct your spelling
preschool
show examples
school
Use synonyms
experiences
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 on
children
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’ in March
,
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apply
show examples
 2015 clearly unveiled that many
children
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 had followed the activities
Correct your spelling
throughout
show examples
through out
Correct your spelling
throughout
show examples
 their
lives
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 which they were experienced from their
parents
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 prior to
start
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starting
show examples
education
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.
On the contrary
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, there are multifarious reasons why
people
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 find
experiences
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 of
teen
Correct your spelling
teenage
show examples
age
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 important for childrens’
future
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lives
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 which can never be undermined. Primarily,
experiences
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 of the
teen
Correct your spelling
teenage
show examples
age
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 for
children
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 are quite effective as they have
good
Add an article
a good
show examples
memory
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 to remember these. To elucidate, at the time of
Use synonyms
pre
Correct your spelling
preschool
show examples
school
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experiences
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,
children
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 may not have a good
memory
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 to remember all the
experiences
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 but at
teen
Correct your spelling
teenage
show examples
age
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, they may have a good
memory
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 to sort out good and bad
experiences
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 meticulously. As a consequence, if teenagers have a good
memory
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 to recall their
experiences
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 of
this
Linking Words
age
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 correctly and in a distinctive manner, they may help in their
future
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lives
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 effectively for a longer period. To exemplify,
a
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apply
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painstaking research conducted by Oxford University in the UK, over a group of 1500
people
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,
age
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 ranging from 8 to 18 years, manifestly revealed that 85% of them accepted the fact that they considered
experience
Add an article
the experience
an experience
show examples
 of their
teen
Correct your spelling
teenage
show examples
age
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 more valuable for the
future
Use synonyms
 life since they had a very few
memory
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 of prior to
school
Use synonyms
experiences
Use synonyms
. To encapsulate, it can unequivocally be concluded that some believe that childrens’
experiences
Use synonyms
 prior to schooling have a certain impact on their
future
Use synonyms
lives
Use synonyms
where
Correct word choice
whereas
show examples
 others assert that
experiences
Use synonyms
 of
teen
Correct your spelling
teenage
show examples
age
Use synonyms
 have majorly important for
children
Use synonyms
. I strongly advocate the thought that
experiences
Use synonyms
 of
teen
Correct your spelling
teenage
show examples
age
Use synonyms
 are far more important than
Use synonyms
pre
Correct your spelling
preschool
show examples
school
Use synonyms
experiences
Use synonyms
 since teenagers can observe
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
things wisely at
this
Linking Words
age
Use synonyms
 and they may plan their
future
Use synonyms
 activities
accordingly
Linking Words
.
Submitted by Mrjit147 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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