IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some employers involve their emoplyees in their decision-making process. Do the advantages outwiegh the disadvantages?

#employers #emoplyees #process #outwiegh
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It is considered that few owners of the organization are organising
the
Correct article usage
apply
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meeting
Fix the agreement mistake
meetings
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 with their
workers
Use synonyms
for taking
Change preposition
to take
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opinions
Correct pronoun usage
their opinions
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 when they need to launch
the
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apply
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innovative products in the markets. I believe that the merits of
this
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 trend are eclipsed by its demerits.
To commence
Fix the infinitive
Commence
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with
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apply
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the drawbacks of
this
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 phenomenon when the workforce
is participated
Wrong verb form
participates
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 and
getting
Wrong verb form
gets
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right
Correct article usage
the right
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 to present their views. The most predominant one is that they always gave preference to those decisions which
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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benefited them. To explain it, it may prohibit the growth of the
company
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due to
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 giving first priority to themselves
instead
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 of taking care of the whole industry.
For example
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, a headline of the famous channel BBC BRITISH BROADCASTING CORPORATION revealed that 40% of the
business
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 loss was experienced by the Amazon Website because they got assistance from their labour to change some regulations in the
company
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. So, getting advice from the employees may have a detrimental effect on the
business
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.
On the other hand
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, there are various benefits for giving the rights to
the
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apply
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ordinary
workers
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 to give their suggestions. The most prominent is
the
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confidence which can
boost
Wrong verb form
be boosted
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 as it helps the employees to make extra efforts as these are essential in the competitive world to compete with other multinational companies. To explain it, they will feel comfortable in the workplace and do their work full of motivation.
For instance
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, a survey
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
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conducted by the Reebook
Company
Use synonyms
 found that the 50% economy of their
business
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 is increased per year by giving importance to the advice of
workers
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.
Thus
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, it has many positive sides which are useful for the
business
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as well as
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workers
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. In conclusion,
although
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this
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 can lead to negative consequences I reiterate that
positive
Correct article usage
the positive
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 sides cannot be underestimated and these contribute to the long-term progress of the
company
Use synonyms
 which will be fruitful for both of them.
Submitted by lovepreetkaur2725 on

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task response
Expand on the disadvantages and advantages in more detail. Provide specific examples and evidence to support your points. Ensure that each paragraph sticks to one main idea and transitions smoothly to the next.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that your introduction clearly states your opinion on whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. Also, provide a concise summary in the conclusion that reinforces your stance.
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