Many manufactured food and drink products contain high level of sugars which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

There are many companies
who
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
are making food and drink products that contain a high rate of sugars. People believe that these items needed to be highly expensive to encourage the community to consume a low quantity of sugar. I agree with
this
statement.
To begin
with,
firstly
, there are many pieces of stuff that are made of sugar
such
as candies, chocolates, coffees etc. These things are harmful to the teeth of children and youngsters.
Secondly
, vendors
also
uses
Change the verb form
use
show examples
carbohydrate in sweets
such
as barfi, gulab jamun. These dishes are used in marriage places. Community do not hesitate to eat
this
type of sweets in marriages that can
also
increase the sugar level of
diabetes
Add an article
a diabetes
show examples
patient
Fix the agreement mistake
patients
show examples
.
Moreover
, if
seller
Correct article usage
the seller
show examples
increases the rate of carbohydrates, it
also
will reduce consumers of sugars.
Furthermore
, if consumption of carbohydrates will expensive,
then
agents would not be able to sell their products properly and due to less selling there would be
lack
Correct article usage
a lack
show examples
of profit.
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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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