Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with?

#people #advertisements #products #lives

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Nowadays, we can not avoid

advertisements

Use synonyms

on our normal days. Everywhere

have

Correct subject-verb agreement

has

show examples

promoted commercial ad. whether on social media on the train or

the

Change preposition

on the

show examples

bus.

This

Linking Words

is very simple to receive information from

advertisements

Use synonyms

. But I quite agree with

advertisements

Use synonyms

indicating

about

Change preposition

that

show examples

new

products

Use synonyms

may develop us.

First,

Linking Words

someone believes that

advertisements

Use synonyms

persuade people to buy new things but

actually

Add a comma

actually,

show examples

if you still do not need that

staff

Correct your spelling

stuff

show examples

why do you have to spend time with that advertisement, it is easier to ignore.

For example

Linking Words

, if Facebook shows some commercial goods

such

Linking Words

as mobile phones and you read their

contents

Fix the agreement mistake

content

show examples

, it means you

have

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

already want the new one that

why

Add a missing verb

is why

show examples

they know about your demand,

then

Linking Words

Capitalize word

Facebook

show examples

facebook

Capitalize word

Facebook

show examples

feeds you

this

Linking Words

information

Second,

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

modern world, the product companies have

Correct the article-noun agreement

apply

show examples

various competitors. That means they will find out the most needest from their clients and they will launch better

model

Fix the agreement mistake

models

show examples

than other companies Consumers have a free will to choose any

products

Use synonyms

. The duty of

advertisements

Use synonyms

is just

reach

Fix the infinitive

to reach

show examples

the data to what customers want.

Also

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

will

be developing

Wrong verb form

develop

show examples

our lives by receiving great information about the new

products

Use synonyms

that may affect our life to better than previous. In conclusion, no matter how many

advertisements

Use synonyms

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

you see

this

Linking Words

is depending

Wrong verb form

depends

show examples

on our individual needs whether the

products

Use synonyms

are necessary or a waste of money. We decide ourselves on Facebook ads,

youtube

Correct your spelling

YouTube

show examples

ads and billboard ads they just predict your demand and give the best message that they can.

Submitted by phuchanate on Thu Mar 31 2022

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general

The essay addresses the prompt and provides relevant examples to support the viewpoint. However, the introduction and conclusion could be more developed, and the structure of the essay could be more coherent and cohesive.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

252 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

encourage
persuade
manipulative
unnecessary
excessive
artificial needs
desires
consumers
oversaturation
impulse buying
financial problems
inform
educate
features
benefits
innovations
raise awareness
social issues
positive behavior
enrich
well-being

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Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with?

Fully explain your ideas

Full-time university students need to spend most of their time studying. Some people, however, claim that students needed to be involved in other activities as well. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Obesity has become an issue in some western countries, especially among children.What are the reasons behind, and what effects does it have on individual's life

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case ? Do you think this a positive or negative situation ?

Many manufactured food and drink product contain high level of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary product should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?