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Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people think that all University students should study whatever they like. Others belive that they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology. Discuss these both view and give your own opinion

#people #university #students #study #belive #subjects #future #science #technology
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It is often argued by some individuals that higher institution
students
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 should read whatever they like while some people hold the perspective that they should be allowed to study
courses
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 that will be beneficial in the nearest future.I will discuss both views but in my opinion,I believed that
students
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 should be allowed to engage in
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whatever
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what ever
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whatever
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courses
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that suites
Change the determiner
that suite
those suites
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 them because
it's promotes
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it promotes
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high
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a high
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level
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 of concentration. On one hand, allowing undergraduates to study only on
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science related
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science-related
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courses
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 brings about higher chances of getting employed after school.In the society we are today,
science
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students
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tends
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tend
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 to be more productive than others because of
advancement
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the advancement
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 of technology
in
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apply
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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Correct your spelling
worldwide
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world wide
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worldwide
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 and
also
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,they can
be equally be
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equally be
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 self-employed without waiting for the government to provide it for them.
For
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example
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,example
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 research conducted in Australia among
students
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 indicated that 85% choose
science
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courses
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 because of higher job opportunities than
arts
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art
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courses
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.So studying
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science related
Add a hyphen
science-related
show examples
Use synonyms
course
Fix the agreement mistake
courses
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 is
essential
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an essential
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 reason being that it secures the future of an individual especially when
it's comes
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it comes
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 to career.
On the other hand
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, giving undergraduates the
chances
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chance
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 to choose their
courses
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 have
a
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apply
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greater merit because of
high
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the high
a high
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level
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 of concentration.Whenever an individual is being allowed to choose
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course
Correct article usage
a course
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 they like,they
tends
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tend
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 to put in more effort making sure that they come out with flying colours.
Linking Words
Moreover
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,Moreover
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 they
concentrates
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concentrate
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 better without coming out with poor grades.
For instance
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,it has been observed by some individuals that the reason why they failed
was
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as
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 a result of lack of interest in that particular
course
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,maybe because
they
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their
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guardian
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guardians
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 push them to study
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course
Fix the agreement mistake
courses
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 that they don't like. To sum up,
this
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 essay discussed why
students
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 should be allowed to choose whatever
course
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 they cherish because it increases
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level
Correct pronoun usage
their level
show examples
 of concentration but why undergraduates should focus on STEM
courses
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 because it raises the chances of getting a job.In my opinion,I believed that allowing
students
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 to take
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Add an article
a course
the course
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course
Fix the agreement mistake
courses
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 of their choice is the best because it brings about
high
Add an article
the high
a high
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level
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 of focus
in
Change preposition
on
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 their academics.
Submitted by agozie2018 on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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