IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

Paying all workers the same salary in a company promotes harmony and respect amongst colleagues. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

#workers #salary #company #harmony #respect #colleagues
There is an opinion, that factories should provide equal pay for all of their
employees
 to reach a respectful atmosphere in the collective. I completely disagree with
this
 statement.
Although
such
 a decision can reduce envy between colleagues, it could lead to a lack of motivation among
workers
 and cause a deficit of candidates for new positions. If the company policy offers an equal amount of money for all their
workers
, people will have no motivation to work hard on a daily basis.
For example
, if one’s salary does not depend on the quality of work or the number of sales, a person has no reason to improve their skills and increase their score.
Therefore
,
employees
 will stop trying to be productive, which can lead to a decrease in the effectiveness of the whole team. Giving the high-qualified
workers
 the same salary as the low-qualified ones can lead to a lack of candidates for high places. Working in a high position always means having a large amount of responsibility and a more quality education.
Moreover
, people in higher posts usually have more complex tasks to do and more difficult problems to solve.
Employees
 whose job requires extra effort and special knowledge could feel underrated because of the constant salary with no opportunity to show their strong suit and get a reward.
As a result
, people will prefer a company, which pay more for the harder job, and the company with equal salaries will be not competitive in
such
 a situation. In conclusion, the decision to equalize money for all the
workers
 will lead to inefficiency of current
employees
 as well as deficiency of applicants to provided workplaces.
Submitted by mary.virtuozo on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: