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Writing Samples /
Band 2.5

«Some people think that governments should spend more money on sports facilities for top athletes. Others argue that this money should be spent for sports facilities for ordinary people. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.»

#«some #people #governments #money #sports #facilities #athletes
These days,
sport
 is developing. The
governments
 spend a huge
avarage
Correct your spelling
advantage
average
 of
money
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
sport
's evolution. Some
people
 opine that
governments
 should allocate more quantity of
money
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
sports
facilities
 for top
athletes
. While other
group
Change the wording
groups
show examples
 of
people
 think that
this
money
 should be expended
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 ordinary
people
's
sports
potentials
Fix the agreement mistake
potential
show examples
. I strongly agree with the idea that the
money
 should be spent by
governments
 on typical
people
's
sport
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
facilities
. As far as I
concerned
Add a missing verb
am concerned
show examples
, they need more investment than the top
athletes
, because they
have
Add a missing verb
do have
show examples
 not as
more experiences
Fix the agreement mistake
much experience
show examples
 as the top ones. So,
first
 of
all
Add a comma
,all
show examples
 they need some attention and investment to be improved in
sports
. Top
athletes
 can find
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 way to have the
sports
facilities
 by themselves. As they are good
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
sports
 they can easily find investors. So they cannot find any difficulties in terms of
money
.
Nevertheless
, there are some top
athletes
 that
have
Add a missing verb
do have
show examples
 not enough
opportunity
Fix the agreement mistake
opportunities
show examples
 to have
sport
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
facilities
. And can be needed for help with it. They can address to
governments
 for
money
 to improve the comfort in
sports
. In conclusion, I want to give my own opinion. From my point of view, the
governments
 should pay attention to both of them, because both should be invested
and
Change preposition
in and
show examples
 improved, as the
sport
 is one of the most important things to be developed.
Submitted by khushnudrustamovich on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • elite sports facilities
  • national pride
  • international events
  • participation
  • high-quality
  • performance
  • national representation
  • fairness
  • social issues
  • population health
  • well-being
  • accessible
  • inclusive
  • community involvement
  • sponsorship
  • endorsements
  • recreational facilities
  • inspire
  • younger generations
  • serious pursuit
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