IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

Many countries are experiencing serious problems with their environment, with pollution of their land, water and air. What are these problems and how might they be reduced?

#countries #environment #pollution #land #water #air
Nowadays, worldwide it has been accepted that
,
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apply
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 the problem of land, water and air pollution is escalating at an alarming rate.
This
 problem is bringing immense impact
for
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on
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 humanity. There are several reasons for
this
 problem, and it is believed that
,
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apply
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 government and individuals both collectively should contribute
towards
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to
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 the solutions. In my upcoming
paragraph
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,paragraph
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 I shall discuss some of the reasons and possible solutions to reduce global contamination. Commencing with the causes which are responsible for the growth of
pollutant
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pollutants
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, the
first
 reason is
industrial
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the industrial
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 revolution. Enormous waste is produced during production,
as
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apply
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a result leading to inorganic bi-product.
Furthermore
, improper waste segregation leads to
the
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apply
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poor disposal
techineques
Correct your spelling
techniques
 causing
direct
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a direct
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 impact on
environment
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the environment
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 in form of mixing with air, water supplies and at
Add an article
the time
a time
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time
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times
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 even with the land.
Secondly
, dangerous emission of
harmfull
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harmful
 gases from
the
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apply
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vehicles, certain home appliances like
fridge
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fridges
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 and
microwave
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microwaves
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 are directly proportional to
the
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apply
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atmospheric pollution.
As a result
, depletion in the
ozen
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ozone
 layer
which
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apply
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has
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tohas
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lead
Wrong verb form
led
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 to increased permeability to toxic ultraviolet rays from
sun
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the sun
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.
Consequently
 affecting several health issues
such
 as Skin cancer, Dermatitis and lung carcinoma. In order to overcome these problems, there are
plethora
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a plethora
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 of
soultions
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solutions
which
Correct pronoun usage
that
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 can be implemented.
Firstly
,
government
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the government
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 should apply strict laws over
disposal
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the disposal
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 of industrial and domestic waste and should impose heavy
fine
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fines
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 along with legal
procedings
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proceedings
, for those who bridge the regulations.
Secondly
,
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government
goverment
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the goverment
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 alone cannot be held responsible,
hence
,famous celebrities should step ahead and help people to educate regarding
goodness
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the goodness
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 of habitat and mother nature. To cite an example,
Save
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the Save
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 soil drive initiated by
indian
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Indian
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 mystic Sadguru has created a wave of concern amongst the mass.
Last
 but not the least, if every individual promises to serve mankind, a healthy ecosystem can be gifted to our
offspirings
Correct your spelling
offsprings
offspring
 as well. To reiterate, in spite of
major
Correct article usage
the major
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 drawback of having harm to the living world, leading to
colosal
Correct your spelling
colossal
 amount of impurities in
biosphere
Add an article
the biosphere
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 can be resolved by executing legislation, educational
programes
Correct your spelling
programmes
programs
 and much more.
Submitted by drshhaneha on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • ecosystem
  • sustainable
  • renewable energy
  • carbon footprint
  • emissions
  • deforestation
  • conservation
  • biodiversity
  • regulatory standards
  • composting
  • urban sprawl
  • green technologies
  • environmental degradation
  • waste management
  • pollutants
  • non-biodegradable
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