IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people enjoy change, and they look forward to new experiences. Others like their lives to stay the same, and they do not change their usual habits. Compare these two approaches to life. Which approach do you prefer? Explain why.

#people #change #experiences #lives #habits #two #approaches #life #approach
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The world will continuously transform, while there are
people
Use synonyms
 who desire
change
Use synonyms
 for various experiences and opportunities, some would refuse and remain stagnant ,particularly to their habits. Personally, I prefer excitement and beneficial transformation,
therefore
Linking Words
 in
this
Linking Words
essay
Add a comma
,essay
show examples
 I ought to explain why I reason to choose the former approach in life. It is evident that over the years, technology has evolved and will continue to do so. Technological advancement is considered to be vital in every sector of the community, and as the operators and users of machines, humans should have the skill to operate and make use of those to efficiently do their purpose.
For instance
Linking Words
, old teachers who don't know the software forms like excel or publisher were extremely challenged to keep up with the new graduates who know how to use technological devices and their software. Learning new ways to adapt to
change
Use synonyms
, particularly in work is crucial, especially if we desire a productive outcome.
Change
Use synonyms
 can make a person respectful and understanding, and it is noticeable to
people
Use synonyms
 who are used to meeting different
people
Use synonyms
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and
learn
Wrong verb form
learning
show examples
 their language and culture; the example of
this
Linking Words
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 travellers and ex-pats. Since they are exposed to random races and origins, whenever they visit a certain place, they become curious about their surroundings but they will understand the tradition and their way of life,
thus
Linking Words
 they are more open-minded than those who will question other
people
Use synonyms
's beliefs or accustoms. In conclusion, acceptance to
change
Use synonyms
 paves the way to becoming competent or skilled especially in work, as well as in making us respectful and understanding human beings.
Submitted by esternonwena123 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: