IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The government spends about 220 million a year supporting museums and galleries in the UK, and a similar amount subsidizing the visual and performing arts. This is a huge sum to spend on minority interests, and the money would be better spent on more important things. It should be up to the people who enjoy cultural attractions to pay for them. What are your views.

#government #million #year #museums #galleries #uk #amount #arts #sum #minority #interests #money #people #attractions
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It is controversial that the government has devoted a high amount of subsidies to support cultural activities
such
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 as artworks or museums. There is no doubt that
this
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 amount should be spent on other areas
such
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 as education and healthcare sections. Some opponents reject
this
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 as they believe that culture is not a trivial matter. I would
further
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 explain both of the views in
this
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 essay.  
First
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 of all, some
people
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 argue that the
people
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 who prefer to visit the art museums should afford the entrance fees by themselves
such
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 that the income can be used to support the running costs of the museums.
In addition
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, given that money spent on cultural activities is to the minority group, it is believed that government should better allocate the resources
for
Change preposition
to
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 the majority group
such
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 as education for children or healthcare for the elderly.  
On the other hand
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, some
people
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 argue that money should be spent on cultural activities as they embed the heritage of the country. Despite it being a minority interest, it can bring economic benefits to the country as it can be considered a tourist attraction and
thus
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 increase the country’s reputation for artworks. The
Correct your spelling
artwork
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art work
Correct your spelling
artwork
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 can be used
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
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place in the international art competition and more
people
Use synonyms
 around the world acknowledge the heritage of the country.   In conclusion, I believe that the benefits of spending on cultural attractions should not be neglected as long as the government
also
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 allocate the resources which benefit
for
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apply
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the majority group.
Submitted by Ceci.law on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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