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Writing Samples
Band 7

Nowadays older people who need employment have to compete with younger people. What problem does this cause and what are the solutions?

#people #employment
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In many countries,
job
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 shortness is one of the serious problems that need to be solved. Due to
this
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, the employment
competition
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 between elderly
people
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 and youngsters has become more severe as time goes by.
However
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, there are still some ways that can solve
this
Linking Words
 problem.
First
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 of all, high demands for
job
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 recruitment can trigger generation conflicts between different aged
people
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. If
people
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 believe the reason why they couldn't be chosen at the
job
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 market was just because of their
age
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,
then
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 they might blame others with a different range of
age
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 who were picked as employers.
For example
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, in my country, a few
people
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 who had failed to get a
job
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 posted some content cursing other candidates whose
age
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 was different from theirs.
Furthermore
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, the severe
competition
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 can make it hard for the young students who just graduated from university to get a
job
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 immediately due to their lack of experience. Considering that usually young
people
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 do not have a wide range of careers, it would be harsh for them to compete with other old
job
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 seekers who have rich experiences.
On the other hand
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, there are some ways that can solve
this
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 problem.
Firstly
Linking Words
, the candidates should be employed based on their
age
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 range. To be more specific, if the superiors hire
people
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 with specific ages
such
Linking Words
 as those who are over the fifties only,
then
Linking Words
 by narrowing the candidate's ages, there would be less severe
competition
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. Another method is to extend the retirement
age
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. Considering the expected lifelong has increased, it should be changed properly so that those who are eager to work more and can do their work under the perfect condition can work more. Once they can be performing more in their occupation, as there would be fewer candidates in
job
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 markets, the
competition
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 would be less severe. In conclusion, even though there are some complicated factors that make the
job
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 employment
competition
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 more tricky, if the employment system and the retirement
age
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 can be changed, it would be beneficial for everyone regardless of their
age
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by seonnie on

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