IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people say smoking should be banned on public places. To what extent do u agree or disagree?

#people #places
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Nowadays it is a general trend to consume tobacco, whether at the home or in places like a smoking
room
Fix the agreement mistake
rooms
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. It is fact that
people
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 smoke in
Add an article
an
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open
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
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 which disturbance other public in many ways.
Therefore
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,
this
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 essay tends to agree that smoking in public areas should be completely restricted.
First
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 of all, the consumer does not care about the harmful effect that causes to him or her or other human beings.
This
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 is an open invitation to diseases that damage body parts as well as cancer. It is reported that about half the proportion of cancer patients were active smokers. Despite the dangerous effect of smoking,
people
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 still can not avoid tobacco. The other reason is be believed that sharing the cigar can cause the chance of infecting with the covid virus. In the pandemic issue, the awareness by the authority was to stop smoking as infection can boost weakening the immune system ,but
also
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 damaging the respiratory system where folk face a lot of
obligation
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obligations
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 while breathing. In spite of the natural causes created by humans, the level of toxic air consumed by an individual who is not a smoker is a possibility to hurt .
Secondly
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, it will have consequences for the environment like pollution. Smoking leads to decreasing the natural air like oxygen as toxic chemicals are released into the air.
In addition
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, the plastic cover which is used to protect the cigar leads to pollution like burning them , in lakes or seas harming the aquatic animals. Youngsters fall into the addiction to tobacco because it can spoil the future. Even though there is an age restriction while buying a
cigarrette
Correct your spelling
cigarette
, there is illegal selling of it.
Therefore
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, the government should take strict action who violates the law and implement find against them. Some
people
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 argue that their privacy is disrespected as by smoking they get relieved from stress. It completely wrong statement ,
people
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 can keep entertained with other activities
such
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 as listening to music, playing sports activities or watching
a
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apply
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comedy shows. In conclusion,
that
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apply
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avoiding cigarettes may help human life by preventing deadly diseases and causing problems to
environment
Add an article
the environment
an environment
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 like pollution.
Hence
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, banning smoking in public can be more beneficial to the
people
Use synonyms
Submitted by jithinphilip10 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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