Some people believe that professional workers such as doctors and teachers should be paid more than sports entertainment personalities. To what extent do you agree or disagree

Few individuals incline to think that some employees
such
as mentors and healthcare practitioners ought to
Add a missing verb
be paid
show examples
paid
Change the verb
pay
show examples
more vis-a-vis sports athletes as well as celebrities. I, partially agree with
this
notion. My position is justified
further
with reasons and examples. On the one hand, it has
beleived
Correct your spelling
believed
by
few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
mankind that doctors and
proffessors
Correct your spelling
professors
are paid well as compared to other famous people.
This
is because
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
they are the pillar of society.
This
means, surgeons, nurses and tutors contribute more
into
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to
show examples
the growth of
community
Add an article
the community
a community
show examples
. Many
helathcare
Correct your spelling
healthcare
professionals are working round the clock to save
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
humans lives.
Similarly
, mentors are considered
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a source of immense knowledge. Many people are becoming successful n working for development in society
such
as
ips
Correct your spelling
its
officers. They acquire the
guidence
Correct your spelling
guidance
from their teachers.
For example
,
an
Change preposition
in an
show examples
interview conducted on
BBC
Correct article usage
the BBC
show examples
news channel, the youngest
ips
Correct your spelling
IPS
is
officer Hasin Safan told the
scccess
Correct your spelling
success
behind his post is the support of the tutors.
On the other hand
, some people argue that famous personalities: actors,
athletes
Correct word choice
and athletes
show examples
should be paid more amount of money.
This
is because
,
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apply
show examples
their career is too short.
This
is to say, other professionals can work
entire
Correct pronoun usage
their entire
show examples
life till their older age while, athletes may
retair
Correct your spelling
repair
retire
retain
after certain age
therefore
, to overcome the future expanse and uncertainty in the career they earn high money and it is justifiable. Another reason is,
the
Correct word choice
that the
show examples
actors
are sacrifice
Change the verb form
are sacrificed
are sacrificing
show examples
their privacy. To elaborate on
this
, almost all the renowned
celebraties
Correct your spelling
celebrities
are not able to
hanging
Change the verb
hang
show examples
around in
city
Correct article usage
the city
show examples
just like
nornal
Correct your spelling
normal
perosn
Correct your spelling
person
. They always need a
sicurity
Correct your spelling
security
with them.
Also
, all the ups and downs of their personal lives mention in newspapers. In conclusion, notwithstanding the health care members are providing the base for the development of
community
Add an article
the community
show examples
by saving many lives and teaching youngsters to become successful respectively, the sports players as well as artists, giving unlimited entertainment and happiness to the community are paid more is logically acceptable.
Submitted by dipendharmani786 on

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Professional workers
  • Societal contribution
  • Scarcity
  • Market forces
  • Consumer demand
  • Role models
  • Economic impact
  • Revenue generation
  • Fair compensation
  • Social equity
  • Intrinsic rewards
  • Job satisfaction
  • Media rights
  • Merchandise sales
  • Public figures
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