IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3.5

Tourism is an ever growing industry. What benefits do you think tourism brings to individuals and society?

#tourism #industry #individuals #society
It is commonly believed that
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
 has
became
Change the verb form
become
show examples
 an popular and welcomed
events
Fix the agreement mistake
event
show examples
 among different
ages
Fix the agreement mistake
age
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
groups. In the
mean while
Correct your spelling
meanwhile
show examples
,
tourism
 has
became
Change the verb form
become
show examples
 a promising area for society and be seen as
make
Wrong verb form
making
show examples
consistengly
Correct your spelling
consistent
consistently
 success in the future. For
Add an article
the individual
an individual
show examples
individual
Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
show examples
,
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
 is a fast and efficient method to have a
clam
Correct your spelling
calm
show examples
 and
relaxing
Wrong verb form
relax
show examples
. Nowadays,
people
 hardly have extra times to have a break, most of them have to work time in order to excel in
company
Add an article
the company
a company
show examples
,
for example
, it is widely be seen that
people
 work overtime until 9 pm in many big companies in big cities.
People
 can gain a chance to have a break and restore energy during spare time.
Moreover
, visiting a new site is
also
 learning the local history and
broaden
Wrong verb form
broadening
show examples
Add an article
the horizon
show examples
horizon
Fix the agreement mistake
horizons
show examples
.
On the other hand
,
tourism
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 been seen as
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 promising area and will promote
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fundamental facilities development and public transport.
For example
, local authorities will promote well-equipped fundamental facilities and public transportation
system
Fix the agreement mistake
systems
show examples
 in order to absorb more tourists, which can
also
 benefit local
citizens
Change noun form
citizens'
citizen's
show examples
 living. What's more,
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 will enhance the service standard of
tourism
,
such
 as
hotel
Fix the agreement mistake
hotels
show examples
,
food
Correct word choice
and food
show examples
installment
Change the spelling
instalment
show examples
, which is increasing the standard of local service industries in the
mean while
Correct your spelling
meanwhile
show examples
. In conclusion,
tourism
 is a win-win industry, which let
people
 live in other cities have the chance to go outside, but
also
bring
Correct subject-verb agreement
brings
show examples
 input
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
local
Add an article
the local
show examples
 economy. The city,
where
Correct word choice
which
show examples
 owns
variety
Add an article
a variety
show examples
 of
tourism
 resources should pay close attention to it.
Submitted by lijialisally on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: