Some people say that playing games can be bad for children. Others say that playing computer games can have positive effects on the way children develop.

#people #games #children #computer #effects

Playing video

games

is said to be devastating for

children

by some individuals.others believe that playing computer

games

can be beneficial to the way

children

develop. While some people,including me, think that playing

games

can be bad for

children

others claim that it can have positive effects on the way

children

develop. The

first

drawback can be a sedentary lifestyle .Because all the time they sit in

a specific places

Correct the article-noun agreement

a specific place

specific places

show examples

with limited movements to playing

games

,so they do not have much activity .It may cause some physical

problems

and other diseases

such

as the high risk of eye

problems

,obesity ,which may cause high blood pressure, and spinal cord

problems

. Another disadvantage is a lack of time to do their other important work.They are at the age where must start to learn various things and experience new skills, so by playing

games

their focus on other activities will reduce.

For example

,they must go to school and participate in various

classes

to get familiar with their abilities

such

as sports

classes

, art and other educational class. About the advantage computer

games

or other electrical devices sometimes are based on different languages, so when they use them ,they will learn another language

besides

their mother tongue, but they can schedule to participate in

classes

or get a personal teacher to learn them. For the

second

advantage,some

games

and programs on devices are analytical and logical , they can improve the power of solving

problems

however

instead

of that they can play brain

teaser

Fix the agreement mistake

teasers

show examples

or visual

classes

,or they can learn them from people around them and environmental situations which they face. In conclusion, I restate that playing computer

games

children

would have pros and cons.for disadvantage it may cause sedentary lifestyle and no time to allocate to important activities.and about ,advantages they may learn new language and skills to analyze and solve

problems

Submitted by 1.amir.shokri.7 on Fri Apr 22 2022

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

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Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

7 paragraphs

311 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.5

Complete response

4.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

addiction
productive activities
excessive gaming
detrimental effects
physical health
obesity
poor posture
eye strain
desensitize
aggressive behavior
antisocial attitudes
cognitive skills
problem-solving
hand-eye coordination
multitasking
educational games
interactive tools
engaging and fun
reinforcing academic knowledge
multiplayer
social skills
teamwork
communication
cooperation

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Some people say that playing games can be bad for children. Others say that playing computer games can have positive effects on the way children develop.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Many museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages?

Newspapers have immense influence on people. why? is it a positive or negative situation?

Some people believe that the good leaders are born, whereas others hold the opinion that the leadership qualities could be obtained during the life. Who represents the good leader qualities indeed?