During a recent plane journey, you sat next to a businessman who owns a chain of restaurants. You talked to him and he suggested that you should contact him about a possible job in one of his restaurants. * remind him when and where you met * tell him what kind of job you are interested in * say why you think you would be suitable for the job

#plane #journey #businessman #chain #restaurants #contact #job

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Dear Mr Jonson I am Masi, kindly appreciate from meeting you on your

last

Linking Words

trip to London .as far as, you remember me, we were seated

Linking Words

to each other during the flight and we had a hot conversation about

finance

Use synonyms

matters. so I had the privilege of getting familiar with you and your brokerage in London. Indeed, it was a great chance for me as well as I told you I’m a trader in a private brokerage in Iran and it would be the opportunity of my life if I could work in a financial department in London as it has a reputation to be known the heart of world

finance

Use synonyms

centre in order to improve my career enthusiastically. whereas I have a great passion for working in the European

finance

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department so I made up my international

finance

Use synonyms

certificate (CFA) which I will attach to my letter. I remember you

told

Correct pronoun usage

metold

show examples

. You need a

finance

Use synonyms

analyzer for your department who had these diplomae. so, I would be passionate if could work with you. I am waiting to hear from you

hence

Linking Words

you decide work with me. Yours sincerely Masoumeh. Dehbashi

Submitted by mr.rahimi30 on Mon Apr 25 2022

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3
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

7 paragraphs

192 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

chain of restaurants
potential job opportunity
relevant experience
managerial role
customer service
qualifications
certifications
unique skills
eagerness
admiration
resume
references
face-to-face meeting

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