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Band 4

The society would benefit from a ban on all forms of advertising because it serves no useful purpose, and can even be damaging. Do you agree or disagree?

#society #ban #forms #purpose
Today, it comes as no surprise that
advertisements
 can be seen everywhere, from banners being hung up on the street to advertising
video
Fix the agreement mistake
videos
show examples
 on the Internet. Most of them are very irritating and sometimes detrimental too.
However
, I suppose that we just need to prohibit and regulate more strictly some kinds of advertising but not all of them. There is no denying the fact that there are more and more fiddling
advertisements
 printed outstandingly
on
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in
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newspaper
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newspapers
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 or distributed by hand. The development of information technology makes the availability of
such
advertisement
Fix the agreement mistake
advertisements
show examples
 viral. Some of them, especially those with violent or sexy imagery, can be harmful to the growth of children in terms of physics and mentality.
Furthermore
, the majority of
advertisements
 tend to exaggerate the quality of products and overlook their drawbacks.
For instance
, attractive videos about a kind of spicy snack or fast food can easily increase people’s appetite and make them skip the main meals which are far more healthy.
However
, only by creating enchanting forms of advertising can we encourage consumers ‘purchase, boost
company’s
Correct article usage
the company’s
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 revenue and eventually lead to economic development.
Moreover
, formal
advertisements
, particularly from prestige labels, might partly direct customers to which products they are more appropriate
with
Change preposition
for
show examples
.
Then
, they can make a good choice on their own.
Therefore
, competent authorities should take immediate measures to control the numbers
as well as
 the content of each advertisement to ensure that they represent the true quality level of
product
Correct article usage
the product
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 and customers are not deceived. To wrap up, I am in favour of
limitation
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limiting
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 and enacting stringent regulations
to
Change preposition
for
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advertisements
instead
 of banning all
kind
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kinds
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 of them.
Submitted by ivvitest3 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • consumerism
  • materialism
  • unnecessary expenditure
  • critical source
  • informed choices
  • misleading
  • exaggerate
  • survival
  • target audience
  • environmental degradation
  • disposal
  • art and expression
  • social and cultural value
  • commercial intent
  • reasoned conclusion
What to do next:
Look at other essays: