IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Many companies and organisations require their employees to wear uniform. What kind of jobs require uniforms? What are the disadvantages of wearing uniform to work?

#companies #organisations #employees #uniform #jobs #uniforms #work
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In the modern era, a significant number of corporations and organisations ask their employees for wearing
uniforms
Use synonyms
, and there are some certain occupations
who
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
 have to wear
uniforms
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, and there are drawbacks.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, some jobs require
to wear
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wearing
show examples
uniforms
Use synonyms
 owing to security, hygiene, and teamwork. Manual workers who work
at
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in
show examples
 dangerous places
such
Linking Words
 as construction areas have to wear durable clothes to protect themselves. Healthcare people who participate in
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
surgery
also
Linking Words
 have to wear special
uniforms
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 that prohibit
from
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apply
show examples
contaminating
Replace the word
contamination
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. Athletes have to wear the same outfit in order to enhance a sense of belonging.
However
Linking Words
, there are some disadvantages of wearing
uniforms
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 in certain situations.
Firstly
Linking Words
, wearing
uniform
Correct article usage
a uniform
show examples
 may increase gender discrimination.
At
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In
show examples
 some working places, female workers wear skirts while males put on pants. Regarding
this
Linking Words
, not only can wearing different
uniforms
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 depending on the gender bring about 
unconvenient
Correct your spelling
inconvenient
 results since it is hard to move actively with skirts, but it may
also
Linking Words
 contribute to a
conflic
Correct your spelling
conflict
 between boys and girls, thereby leading to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
gender disparity.
Secondly
Linking Words
, since outfits are important to express individuality in democratic countries, wearing
uniform
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the uniform
a uniform
show examples
 can make people
to
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apply
show examples
be rebellious.
For instance
Linking Words
, recent media in Korea reports that almost 20%
respondents
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of respondents
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 want to protest
for
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apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
abolishing
uniforms
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.
Hence
Linking Words
, a significant number of workers oppose wearing
uniforms
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 since their individualities should be respected. In conclusion, while I accept that wearing
uniforms
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 can sometimes be useful for specific jobs, it is not the best option since it might trigger
to
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apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
sexual discrimination and rebellion.
Submitted by hiasince38 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cohesive appearance
  • Professionalism
  • Hygiene
  • Identification
  • Authority
  • Standardized look
  • Safety
  • Individuality
  • Personal expression
  • Discomfort
  • Impractical
  • Costly
  • Maintenance
  • Job dissatisfaction
  • Autonomy
  • Freedom
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