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Band 2

Nowadays many people prefer to shop in supermarkets rather than small shops or local markets? Is this positive or negative for development? Discuss and give your opinion.

#people #shop #supermarkets #shops #markets #development
In
this
 present world, we have many options for buying food.
However
, and even if the most common option is
supermarkets
 since it seems the easiest and fastest way of doing it, I would discuss the negative consequences that it has for development in
this
 short essay. To start with, and
comparing
Wrong verb form
compared
show examples
 to small shops or local markets,
supermarkets
 are
own
Wrong verb form
owned
show examples
 by corporations that don't
persue
Correct your spelling
pursue
 a local benefit
rathen
Correct your spelling
rather
 than their own one. In
this
 sense, we have seen how the more the
supermarkets
increse
Correct your spelling
increase
 their presence in the communities, the most the food self-sufficiency decreased because it
become
Change the verb form
becomes
show examples
dependant
Replace the word
dependent
show examples
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
 global markets and their dynamics. On top of that,
supermarkets
 only sell what can pass
certain
Correct article usage
a certain
show examples
 quality
bar
Fix the agreement mistake
bars
show examples
. They
throw away
Add a hyphen
throw-away
show examples
 tons of products that are consumables and in a good condition but they are not beautiful and attractive to the eye. As consequence, the development of societies is harmed because what's produced can't be
Correct your spelling
sealed
smelled
spelt
selled
Correct your spelling
sold
show examples
, resulting in
an
Remove the article
apply
show examples
increased pressure for producers. In summary, I would suggest
to start
Change the verb form
starting
show examples
 shopping
what
Change preposition
for what
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is needed in local versus mega-stores in order to have a positive impact
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the development of our communities.
Submitted by verzuba on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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