IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Nature has a more significant impact on human adult intelligence than nurture. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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People
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 argue about what influences human
intelligence
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 the most: nature or nurture. It is agreed that great brain abilities are a result of an enriched environment rather than genes and hereditary factors.
This
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 essay will discuss the effect of genetic and environmental variables on
people
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`s IQ and conclude that genes do not necessarily determine
intelligence
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 level.
Firstly
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, all of our knowledge and thinking abilities are determined by our experience. Intelligent
people
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 are not genetically predisposed to be intelligent, but are the result of environmental factors,
such
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 as culture, surrounding
people
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, activities. If
intelligence
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 was defined only by genetic factors the world would split into two: population with high IQ and low. But actually there are lots of intelligent
people
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 all over the world. 
Secondly
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, as the brain is the most flexible part of the body, it can be trained.
In other words
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, with a certain effort
people
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 can boost their
intelligence
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.
For example
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 through learning. So a child whose parents gave proper attention to his education will show generally better results than those who do not study well.
People
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 with powerful mind are always active in learning.
That is
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 why it is crucial to make the brain work to encourage
intelligence
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 development. High level
intelligence
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 is a product of inherited and acquired influences. Of course with parents with high IQ there is a big probability of getting a “great brain”
However
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, nurture is paramount in the relative contribution that both influences make to thinking abilities.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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