Due to the development and rapid expansion of supermarkets in some countries, many small and local businesses are unable to compete. Some people think that the closure of local businesses will bring about the death of local communities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, with the widespread of
supermarkets
in some nations, many small local businesses are at risk of disappearing.
While
it is believed that the collapse of these local shops will
cause
Verb problem
have
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a significant impact on society, I indeed hold that
this
type of work is the livelihood of many families, so its closure will mean the backward evolvement of many
communities
.
Firstly
, a lot of developed countries completely embraced the rapid expansion of big shops and considered them as a way of showing the industry development.
Moreover
,
Supermarkets
are likely to have lower prices, and they are deemed more convenient.
For instance
, a person can find all his desired items in one Supermarket
instead
of going around multiple small shops.
However
,
this
colossal development overshadowed
groceries
Fix the agreement mistake
grocery
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stores
that
Correct word choice
and
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many families
gain
Wrong verb form
gained
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their wages
from
Change preposition
apply
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, resulting in the rise of unemployment rates in local
communities
, which can affect
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
economic growth as well.
Secondly
,
this
new trend is a threat to many shop owners and those who are willing to start a new
business
.
In other words
,
Supermarkets
raised the standards of marketing that many young adults can't handle and are too afraid to
risk
Wrong verb form
risks
show examples
and launch a company
that is
condemned to fail before
its
Correct pronoun usage
it
show examples
start
Correct subject-verb agreement
starts
show examples
.
This
means that local
communities
are losing their brains and the chance to develop.
For example
, many youngsters are leaving their hometowns in the hope of finding better opportunities
elsewhere
.
Therefore
,
this
new development doesn't only break the ambition of many young people to own a
business
, but it
also
affects the societies' thriving. In conclusion, the competition between
Supermarkets
and local businesses is unfear and overwhelming to small
business
owners. Some people, namely me, hold that
this
new culture has counterproductive results on the local
communities
, leading to increased unemployment rates
as well as
oppressing young adults' dreams of starting a new
business
.
Submitted by majdouline.azouzoute on

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task response
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coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, focus on organizing your ideas logically with clear topic sentences for each paragraph, use linking words to connect ideas, and ensure smooth transitions between paragraphs.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • rapid expansion
  • compete
  • closure
  • death
  • local communities
  • wider range of products
  • convenience
  • unique character
  • personalized customer service
  • unemployment
  • job opportunities
  • traditional skills
  • craftsmanship
  • support
  • local economy
  • decline
  • community spirit
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