some of parents think mathematics is redundant, else believe it is fundamental to be taught . discuss the both sides

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Opinions are divided on whether
mathematics
Use synonyms
is essential or not. In my opinion, the knowledge of
this
Linking Words
discipline is significant for routine activities of life and it
also
Linking Words
sharpens minds. I will discuss and analyse both sides of the argument in
this
Linking Words
essay. On the one hand, it is believed by some parents that
mathematics
Use synonyms
has become a redundant subject as calculators are available to assist students in doing calculations. Almost everyone has a smartphone in their hands these days which
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
equipped with an integrated digital calculator technology.
Therefore
Linking Words
, children can spend their time learning other imperative subjects by saving time using electronic calculators for calculations. On
this
Linking Words
account,
this
Linking Words
point of view can be considered.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, many parents support mathematical education because it is necessary for everyday life,
as well as
Linking Words
improves the brain’s learning potential. With
regards
Fix the agreement mistake
regard
show examples
to the former, it is true that the basics of
mathematics
Use synonyms
,
such
Linking Words
as addition, subtraction, division and multiplications are vital for
day to day
Add a hyphen
day-to-day
show examples
living.
For instance
Linking Words
, when people go for groceries or shopping, they have to check their bills for any miscalculations without calculators if they have forgotten their phones at home. Another significance of
mathematics
Use synonyms
is its ability to modify the cognitive skills of learners since it improves the thinking and
problem solving
Add a hyphen
problem-solving
show examples
activity of the brain. Studies have proven that mathematicians are 20 times more
genious
Correct your spelling
genius
than calculator users. In conclusion, after analyzing both sides of the argument,
it is clear that
Linking Words
each side has
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
strong support.
However
Linking Words
, in my opinion, the understanding of
mathematics
Use synonyms
is crucial for people to perform daily life calculations and it
also
Linking Words
polishes their intellectual power.
Submitted by tubashaukat93 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
The logical structure of the essay is decent, but could be improved with a more systematic progression of ideas.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present and fulfill their purpose, providing a good overall framework for the essay.
coherence cohesion
The main points are supported with relevant examples and arguments, enhancing the overall coherence of the essay.
task achievement
The essay provides a complete response to the task, addressing both sides of the argument effectively.
task achievement
The ideas are generally clear and comprehensive, but could benefit from a more in-depth exploration of the arguments.
task achievement
The use of relevant specific examples strengthens the arguments and enhances the overall clarity of the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • redundant
  • unnecessary
  • fundamental
  • essential
  • problem-solving
  • critical thinking
  • practical applications
  • real-world examples
  • everyday life
  • mathematics education
What to do next:
Look at other essays: