Some people work for the same organization all their working life. Others think that it is better to work for different organisations.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Some employments choose to change their
job
Use synonyms
when they are no longer fit with the environment.
However
Linking Words
, some
group
Fix the agreement mistake
groups
show examples
choose to serve only one organization for their entire working life, while others decide to be employed by different institutions. These issues happen for several reasons, which will be explained more. People who manage to stay in the same employment for a long time, have several advantaged reasons.
Firstly
Linking Words
, public companies offer benefits for their permanent workers. Despite not liking it much, workers might stay as they get spoiled by a higher salary and good retirement money. In Indonesia, an employee of a state-own enterprise
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
will gain promotion when they have spent several years in the
company
Use synonyms
.
In addition
Linking Words
, for those who work for 30 years, the
company
Use synonyms
will offer more money
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
on their retirement day than people who work only for several years.
Secondly
Linking Words
, due to overpopulation, everyone is seeking a
job
Use synonyms
.
Thus
Linking Words
, it will be too risky to resign from a
job
Use synonyms
, while your replacement will certainly come quicker than getting a new
job
Use synonyms
.
As a result
Linking Words
, employees are frightened to take the risk of struggling to get a new
job
Use synonyms
.
On the contrary
Linking Words
, most
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fresh graduates are moving from one business to another business looking for experiences. happens since they are not satisfied with their previous
job
Use synonyms
or teammates.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
group of people have no compulsory to
fulfill
Change the spelling
fulfil
show examples
their living expenses as their parents still afford them the amount of money.
Thus
Linking Words
, taking the risk of losing a
job
Use synonyms
is not a huge problem for them. To conclude, some folks hardly deal with their
job
Use synonyms
when they are not feeling satisfied.
Hence
Linking Words
, they prefer to look for another opportunity.
However
Linking Words
, in my opinion,
Use synonyms
job
Add an article
the job
show examples
has its challenges, it is our
job
Use synonyms
to adjust to the
company
Use synonyms
, and as feedback, the
company
Use synonyms
will offer more
bonus
Fix the agreement mistake
bonuses
show examples
if we stay longer.
Submitted by wennyfatikas on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: