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Band 5.5

Shopping habits depend more on your age group than anything else. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#habits #age #group
Without a denying, a widely heated debate pertaining to whether shopping
habits
 have a positive relationship with
age
 group, whether some
people
 are opposed to
this
 opinion, as for my perspective, I am holding an identical opinion toward
this
 statement and an array of reasons will be thoroughly elaborated on as follows. One primary reason is that
people
 ought to wear suitable attire depending on the occasion and dress code. To be more specific,
people
 are getting mature from adolescents to adults, so they should change their style of garments. Thereby, their shopping
habits
 would be directly affected by the aforementioned factors. Take me as an example. After graduating from university and getting older, I started to engage in the technology company; as a consequence, I am forced to wear and buy appropriate garments to meet the regulation of the company.
Moreover
, owing to different ages,
people
 have various aesthetic values
such
 as from loving animated cartoons to quality and luxurious items;
as a result
, their shopping
habits
 were changed by their related hobbies and interests. To put it another way, period of young
people
 hardly appreciate similar commodities as mature adults for different aspects and views leading to purchasing corresponding stuff. A study conducted by Cambridge University concluded that roughly 60
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of
people
 have distinctive differences in purchasing
habits
 compared to each stage of
age
. To sum up, based on the aforementioned, even though some
people
 are holding an opposite opinion toward that
age
 group in relation to shopping
habits
, I
still
Add a missing verb
am still
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 deeply convinced that
people
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
different
Add an article
a different
show examples
age
Fix the agreement mistake
ages
show examples
 would not buy similar items which they like before.
Submitted by justin1996lin on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • preferences
  • financial capacities
  • technological savviness
  • online platforms
  • traditional in-store shopping
  • marketing and advertising
  • susceptible to trends
  • generational values
  • environmental awareness
  • sustainable and ethical shopping
  • value for money
  • product longevity
  • cultural background
  • income levels
  • personal interests
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