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Band 6

Nowadays, more people move away from their friends and families for work. Does this development have more advantages or disadvantages?

#people #move #friends #families #work #development
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Nowadays, the number of individuals who are moving away from their friends and family for work is increasing. Some people go far away to a different area in the country while some of them move out to another country. In my opinion,
this
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 development has more advantages than its disadvantages. On the one hand, there are quite difficult to get a promotion or salary increase without moving to another branch or a new company because of high competition. Regarding
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 people attempt to find out the employment opportunities for their careers part and do not hesitate to take them even if they have to move out far away from family.
Therefore
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, it is obvious that folks who decide to leave their hometown for their job can uplift their economic status and
living
Correct article usage
the living
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 standard of the family with their earnings. Along with
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, it is seen that when a person stays away from their home it reinforces his bond with family and friends.
On the other hand
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, there are
few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
 disadvantages of
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 development as well. The foremost is feeling homesick and missing loved ones, they may feel isolated and stressed.
Moreover
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, if individuals move abroad, they have to adjust themself to a new environment
such
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 as weather, food, new place, and culture which could make them feel overwhelmed or culture
shocked
Replace the word
shock
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. In conclusion, despite some drawbacks, there are a lot of benefits to moving for work propose. It
also
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 strengthens
relationship
Add an article
the relationship
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 between a person and their family members.
Also
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, it is the best way to seek career prospects and get work-related goals.
Submitted by kjullawt on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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