IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people believe that technology has made man more social and others think that it has made him less social. Discuss both views and give your opinion?

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People
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 have many views as to whether
technology
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. Some
people
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 believe that
technology
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 keeps them from
society
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, other
people
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 believe that
technology
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 has the advantage of communicating in
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society
Add an article
a society
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. I agree with the latter view and think that
technology
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 can
also
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 give more benefit to
people
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 which social
communication
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. In the following essay, the reasons to support my opinion will be discussed in detail.
Technology
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 has an essential role in way of human life in many aspects.
First
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 of all, We can not deniable that
technology
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 is involved in every part of
society
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.
Technology
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 improves
communication
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 between
people
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 to
people
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 which is comfortable and saves time.
For example
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, parents who live in
countryside
Correct article usage
the countryside
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 will use
cellphone
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a cellphone
the cellphone
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 to keep in touch with their children who study at urban universities.
Moreover
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, programmers develop
communication
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 applications
such
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 as Facebook, Twitter and Instagram which
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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post short massage or upload short clips. Social media users will
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
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follow their friends
by
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on
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online
Add an article
the online
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channel
Fix the agreement mistake
channels
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. Some
people
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 might argue that
technology
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 are cause
of
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apply
show examples
less social which undirect relation with other
people
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.
For example
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, family members are addicted to
technology
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 devices that create gaps in their
relationship
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relationships
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.
However
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, if
people
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has
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apply
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can creative control
technology
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 used, it will develop their connection. So, I personally think that
technology
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 gives more social advantages for
people
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 in
society
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more
Correct quantifier usage
apply
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than disadvantages. In conclusion,
although
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people
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 may concern about the social advantage of
technology
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, I strongly believe that
technology
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 is still more social for everybody to increase
communication
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 options in their lifestyle.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • social interaction
  • connect
  • communicate
  • video conferencing
  • stay in touch
  • online communities
  • forums
  • like-minded individuals
  • global communication
  • collaboration
  • access to information
  • knowledge
  • bridge the gap
  • social isolation
  • detachment
  • face-to-face communication
  • genuine human connection
  • maintain
  • real-life interactions
  • balance
What to do next:
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