Some people think that the family is the most powerful influence on a child’s development.  Others, however, believe that other influences (such as television, friends, music, etc.) have a bigger effect on a child today.

The flow charts describe
the
Remove the article
apply

It is unlikely that your sentence needs the article the before all. Consider deleting the article.

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all stages for generating
cement
and concrete. Overall, the whole process starts
at
Change preposition
with

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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pulverizing, mixing and heating materials which generate
cement
.
Next
,
cement
puts into
concrete
Add an article
the concrete
a concrete

The noun phrase concrete mixer seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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mixer
with other materials to manufacture concrete.
Firstly
, limestone, clay and crusher are dropped into the crusher respectively and squash into the power.
Secondly
, it enters the
mixer
and workers rotate
heater
Correct article usage
the heater

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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to heat the
mixer
with fire. Followed by reproducing the product in the grinder, the produced
cement
are
Change the verb form
is

The verb are does not seem to agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

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bagged . Afterwards, according to
planned
Add an article
the planned
a planned

The noun phrase planned proportion seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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proportion of material, workers pour solid materials including 15%
cement
of all, 25% sand and 50% gravel into the concrete
mixer
. In the
next
stage, 10%
water
Change preposition
of water

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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is joined
in
Change preposition
to

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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the machine. After mixing constantly, the production of concrete is finished.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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