IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

Some people believe that to protect local culture, tourism should be banned in some areas whereas others think that change is inevitable and banning tourism will have no benefits. Discuss both sides and give you an opinion.

#people #culture #tourism #areas #change
Few folks think that to save local culture, travel should be prohibited in certain locations whereas others think that change is not possible and doing that will end up having no advantage, while in my ,opinion it's quite beneficial for financial as well as culture. I would argue that how
tourism
 can aid a particular country's economy, whereas if
this
 activity is stopped by officials how it could impact our society. On the one hand, some people have faith that resorting is not safe, they think that what if the local community start indulging with foreigners and shares their cultures. touristry should be blocked in some regions where applicable. Almost thousand of people travel around the world to spend their holidays, during the course of the period they interact with many locals and share languages, way of living, and discusses tradition.
On the other hand
, banning
tourism
 is unavoidable because it's everyone's leisure,
moreover
, there will be no financial interest if that particular activity is prohibited. As per the
last
 year's survey at the University of Lahore, approximately 5 million people tend to travel for the purpose of tours to different areas of the world, and
this
 generated $1.5 billion in revenue.
Tourism
 creates relationships between countries and their citizens, it led to representing the host nation's beautiful landscapes.
For example
, In 2019,
tourism
 produced lots of new jobs and contributed to GDP in Pakistan. To conclude, in my ,opinion
tourism
 is very important for every nation, it brings a lot of benefits to
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
specific tribes or areas, for ,example new jobs, infrastructure development, economic growth and foreign exchange earnings. No individual would want to ban resorting because doing that there are a lot of losses.
Submitted by afzaalahmad632 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: