The percentage of overweight children in western society has increased by almost 20 % in the last 10 years. Discuss the causes and effects

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Here, Over the past few years, developed countries have encountered various cases of
children
suffering from the problem of obesity.
This
essay will discuss the possible causes for
this
increasing problem among
children
and
also
suggests the possible consequences that may result in case of negligence.
Furthermore
, one of the main causes of obesity among
children
is poor diet as they are often seen eating junk
food
.
At
Change preposition
On
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almost every corner of the street, one can
found
Wrong verb form
find
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restaurants offering mouth tempting fast foods. Kids at home
also
are found to eat processed
food
because their parents do not find sufficient time for preparing the
food
.
For example
, packaged foods are purchased and kept in
fridge
Add an article
the fridge
show examples
for days.
This
food
is not fresh and healthy.
Hence
affects their health, leading to
Add a hyphen
build-up
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build
Change the verb form
building
show examples
up of fat and compromising their fitness.
As a result
, there are many possible consequences faced by the
children
. One
such
ill-effect is the risk of developing
health related
Add a hyphen
health-related
show examples
severe diseases like diabetes. So,
This
kind of debilitating illness implies that the child would need to be injected with insulin for the whole life.
Moreover
, overweight
children
are often found to be bullied .
For example
, many overweight kids are found disturbed facing the negative stigma of being obese Here,On the whole, it is evident that there are various causes responsible for obesity among
children
and can lead to serious consequences in the future.
Also
, It is the duty of their parents and relatives to ensure that appropriate steps are taken to prevent
this
problem from getting worst in the future.
Submitted by praveenkumarputchala1998 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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