IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

The environmental problems that today's world is facing are so great that there is little ordinary people can do to improve the situation. So government and large organizations should be responsible for reducing the amount of damage being done to the environment.To what extend do you agree or disagree?

#world #people #situation #government #organizations #amount #damage #environment
In the recent era, the majority of individuals are being suffered from environmental issues. These situations could not be handled by only a few folks,
consequently
, the government and the large organisations ought to be involved to protect the
environment
. In my opinion, I completely agree with
this
 statement as a combined effort of the administration and large businesses could protect the
environment
 from deterioration. To commence with, it is absolutely true that the authority has a big responsibility to solve the
environment
Replace the word
environmental
show examples
 issue in their country
that is
facilatited
Correct your spelling
facilitated
 by large organisations.
For instance
, Global warming has been happening since the early 20th
centuary
Correct your spelling
century
 and it has been breaking the
atmosphare
Correct your spelling
atmosphere
. Nowadays,
weather
Add an article
the weather
show examples
 is completely changing day by day, people could not
be predict
Change the verb form
predict
show examples
 the weather and range of seasons. Due to
this
 reason, the administration should be worked with the National Geographical group to make a plan to cultivate the trees in
subdistrict
Add an article
the subdistrict
show examples
.
As a result
, it is clear that to solve the environmental problem we need to be a big
sources
Correct the article-noun agreement
source
show examples
 that it cannot be done by
Add an article
a citizen
the citizen
show examples
citizen
Fix the agreement mistake
citizens
show examples
.
In addition
, the authority and big businesses have the power to reduce the
environment
Replace the word
environmental
show examples
 problems.
For example
, offering subsidies to electric vehicles to promote the use of renewable energy sources for transportation, drafting strict policies on industrial waste disposal and so on are some steps taken by the administrators across the nation to protect the mother earth. To conclude, the intensity of
environment
Replace the word
environmental
show examples
 issues has reached
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
at
Correct your spelling
a
show examples
 peak point,
thus
, only
masses
Correct article usage
the masses
show examples
 cannot solve these problems, the authority and large businesses join
hand
Fix the agreement mistake
hands
show examples
 together and work towards the common goal of reducing the damage to our
environment
.
Submitted by info.rahil on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: