More children in developed countries are becoming overweight. This is a serious problem for wealthy countries. Discuss some causes and effects of this problem. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Not surprisingly, in today's world, obesity is widespread like a virus and hard to cope with the situation we are in unless we are sensible to stop being overweight. Not only the children but

also

Linking Words

any

Change preposition

of any

show examples

age have been fighting with that unfavourable issue. Let me tell you about

this

Linking Words

with relevant examples as far as I am concerned. Yes,

this

Linking Words

has been a serious problem for developing countries. There are a host of unsolved problems more than we are imagining if we don’t have to be conscious about it at all. It’s

such

Linking Words

a simple underlying matter of not enough physical activity and unhealthy diet activity. With the enhancement of modern technology, smart devices are the most popular utilities among people in a decade. The individuals’ elementary

lifestyles

Use synonyms

have been obviously changed into

lifestyles

Use synonyms

in another unknown world by the development of smartphones. For

this

Linking Words

topic, I have to say the disadvantages of

Correct your spelling

smartphones

show examples

smart phones

Correct your spelling

smartphones

show examples

. Under the supervision of parents,

kids

Use synonyms

should be allowed to access limited use of watching tv, playing video games, surfing the internet and some

such

Linking Words

. Due to the lack of control,

kids

Use synonyms

are over satisfied to spend their

time

Use synonyms

on these. The outcome is that they are gradually in unfavourable conditions

such

Linking Words

as being overweight, lack of enough sleep and eating more junk foods without having foods full of nourishment. Being in the sedentary

Use synonyms

lifestyles

Fix the agreement mistake

lifestyle

show examples

and no action

Change preposition

apply

show examples

doing exercises tend to obese without any alarming signs. If we are unconsciously following

this

Linking Words

pattern of living, our children are going to be at the point of anxiety conditions very soon. Obesity’s consequences are diabetes, high blood pressure, heart diseases and breathing problems like sleep apnea.

Instead

Linking Words

of spending much

time

Use synonyms

on these

lifestyles

Use synonyms

, it’s better

that

Correct your spelling

than

show examples

the parents let their

kids

Use synonyms

play around with others in the park or in the compound yards. Diverse playing games on the ground is the best exercise for the

kids

Use synonyms

. There is one main thing left to mention about obesity.

That is

Linking Words

an eating curriculum in their daily routine. In

this

Linking Words

day and age, there are too many fast-food restaurants.

Fast-food

Correct your spelling

Fast food

show examples

is not good for our

health

Use synonyms

because food is made to be more delicious by using some chemicals which let our bodies

increase

Fix the infinitive

to increase

show examples

cholesterol and excess fat. Today parents are pretty busy at their work and running like a storm all the

time

Use synonyms

. They are unable to give enough

time

Use synonyms

to take good care of their kid's eating

activity

Fix the agreement mistake

activities

show examples

As a result

Linking Words

, they don’t mind ordering snacks

such

Linking Words

as sandwiches, burgers, candies, cookies, and so forth in restaurants or vending machines. They don’t even have

time

Use synonyms

to think about what is good or what is bad for their

kids

Use synonyms

, and

this

Linking Words

situation leads to big trouble in the very near future. Home cooking is

the

Correct article usage

show examples

effective way to against obesity among children. The foodstuffs

with

Change preposition

apply

show examples

full of

norishment

Correct your spelling

nourishment

are

also

Linking Words

good to circulate blood through their bodies. Being good

the

Change preposition

at the

show examples

flow of blood is the best positive sign for

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

health

Use synonyms

. Sometimes, genetics can play a role and sometimes there’s

Correct your spelling

show examples

and

Correct your spelling

show examples

underlying medical condition. To sum up, there is a correlation between

health

Use synonyms

and wealth.

Health

Use synonyms

is the most essential thing in our living

standard

Fix the agreement mistake

standards

show examples

. Our offsprings are our future. So we have to be very aware of their living

lifestyles

Use synonyms

princessclairdelune111

May 25, 2022

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

555 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

obesity
sedentary
caloric intake
processed foods
fast food culture
screen time
metabolic disorders
healthcare expenditure
lifestyle diseases
preventative strategies
nutritional education
public health policy
body mass index (BMI)
emotional well-being
stigmatization
exercise regimen
eating habits
junk food
socioeconomic factors
health literacy

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More children in developed countries are becoming overweight. This is a serious problem for wealthy countries. Discuss some causes and effects of this problem. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

In many countries, a prison sentence is considered as the best way to decrease crime. However, education is often argued as a more effective way. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think that all university students should study whatever they like. Others believe that they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

You want to improve your knowledge of foreign languages which can help you at work. Write a letter to a foreign language teacher. In your letter Where did you hear about the teacher? Why do you want to learn a foreign language? Ask some questions about the course.

Some people think that children should begin their formal education at a very early age. Some think they should begin at least 7 years old.