It is expected that there will be a higher proportion of old people than young people in the future in some countries. Do you think it is a positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
The youth is considered in many nations as the backbone of an economy. It is argued that in the near
time
there will be more senior residents than youngsters in many territories. I would argue that it is a negative phenomenon and in Add a comma
time,
this
essay, I will highlight the reasons along with
illustrations followed by a lucid conclusion, Thereafter
.
To commence with, The very first factor encountered in this
regard is that youths are fulfilling the nation's workforce necessities. State's
financial stability is solely dependent on industries and other firms; Correct article usage
The state's
However
, The requirements of these businesses could be effectively effectuated by youths. Thus
, countries having large numbers of young people have more vibrant commerces. To cite an example, In ,India 40% of the population are
under thirty so in many countries of the world which have a reduced workforce, they are supplying their men's power.
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
Secondly
, The other reason is that over-aged can not afford to attribute their much time for
work. The aged public Change preposition
on
has
not much energy to carry out daily work schedules or shift duty compared to youths and later they have many health implications. Verb problem
does
Hence
, They are less productive and working hours can create further
well-being breakdowns. For Example
, In Germany
a vast part of the community Add a comma
Germany,
are
old people so annually they are called various skilled people from other parts of the world.
To summarise, I Correct subject-verb agreement
is
have
Verb problem
am
concern
Replace the word
concerned
over
Change preposition
apply
this
that in many countries Correct pronoun usage
apply
over-60
Correct your spelling
over 60
numbers are hiking
Wrong verb form
is rising
while
youngers
are Correct your spelling
younger
in
Change preposition
apply
the
declining state since young Correct article usage
apply
adult
can easily Fix the agreement mistake
adults
complete
the state's Verb problem
fill
workers
vacant positions, and old persons unable to anticipate their Change noun form
workers'
worker's
much
time to duty. Given Correct quantifier usage
apply
this
situation, It seems that in such
provinces, the government need to lift population control restrictions so they can birth more children that
later can play roles of professionals in future.Correct pronoun usage
who
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logical structure
Task Response: The essay needs to address the prompt more directly and provide a clear position on whether the future demographic shift is a positive or negative development. The introduction and conclusion should also be more explicit in presenting the writer's stance on the issue.
introduction conclusion present
Coherence and Cohesion: The essay lacks a clear and organized structure. Each paragraph should have a clear topic sentence and supporting details. The conclusion should effectively summarize the main points and provide a final stance on the issue. Additionally, transition words and cohesive devices should be used to improve the flow of ideas.