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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some young people are leaving the countryside to live in cities and towns, leaving only old people in the countryside. What problems does this cause? What can be done to solve this problem?

#people #countryside #cities #towns
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Nowadays, many youngsters tend to move to urban
areas
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instead
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 of living in rural
areas
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. I believe exploring the causes of
this
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 problem can assist in finding suitable solutions to resolve it. Better
job
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 opportunities could partly account for migrating numerous young people to
cities
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. Since most big companies exist in towns and
cities
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, they provide a wide range of
job
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 titles. In
this
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 way, the young generation tends to move to big
cities
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 in search of a better life and make ends meet. To address
this
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 issue, it is the government's responsibility to provide a large number of
job
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 vacancies in rural
areas
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 in order to attract young people's attention and help them run their own businesses. Governments should
also
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 provide a wide variety of financial support
so as
Correct word choice
apply
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to help startups to enter foreign markets. Higher living standards can
also
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 explain why youngsters move to towns and
cities
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. Since a majority of facilities are provided for urban citizens, they have easy access to a wide variety of upmarket shops and fancy restaurants, as well as a sound healthcare system. If authorities tried to invest in rural
areas
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 the same as urban
cities
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, the younger generation would be more incentivized to live in their hometown. In
this
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 way, the standard of living for all
areas
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 would increase in the same pattern, and all people would have quiet access to the same facilities. To conclude, even though higher living standards and better
job
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 opportunities have contributed to leaving the countryside, governments and authorities can remedy the situation. In my opinion, providing a wide variety of
job
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 vacancies and better facilities in the countryside
are steps
Change the verb form
are stepped
are stepping
show examples
 in the right direction.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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