Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

many are of the belief that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
financial
succeed
Replace the word
success
show examples
is
more
Add an article
a more
show examples
important
issue
for each country. while some individuals
are believe
Change the verb form
believe
show examples
that
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
considering
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
other
Change the wording
another issue
other issues
show examples
issue
such
as education , health care and etc , are important as same as economic
progress
. there are rational arguments on both
side
Change to a plural noun
sides
show examples
of
this
topic which will be discussed in
details
Fix the agreement mistake
detail
show examples
, followed by my point of view. economic development always is a sign of the government ‘s power
also
authorities even sometimes will show their ability to manage the country and
exist
Wrong verb form
existing
show examples
problems. because always economic
progress
provide
Change the verb form
provides
show examples
a desirable condition for growth
all
Change preposition
in all
show examples
field. because
financial
Add an article
the financial
show examples
issue
is
a
Change the article
the
show examples
first
subject in each decision . when a government want to run a new
for example
building at
first
they have to
evaluated
Change the verb
evaluate
show examples
this
project in terms of financial conditions and check all resources which can supply their needs
then
they assess other factors.
In addition
,
powerful
Correct article usage
a powerful
show examples
economy guarantees other decisions which governments have to do.
on the other hand
, sometimes especially in poor countries,
if
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
concentrating only on financial
progress
might prevent them to gain other improvements. because they have limited financial and natural resources. so they have to specify their resources
such
as time and
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
energy for critical cases
such
as
health
Correct article usage
the health
show examples
care system. In conclusion, as far as I am concerned, and because of more
effect
Fix the agreement mistake
effects
show examples
of financial
issue
Fix the agreement mistake
issues
show examples
in each country I completely agree with
this
statement
which
Correct word choice
that
show examples
governments must pay more attention to economic
progress
but other sections are
also
important.
Submitted by salehi19862 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • standard of living
  • sustainable development
  • social equality
  • environmental degradation
  • cultural heritage
  • technological innovation
  • wealth disparity
  • human development index
  • holistic approach
  • quality of life
  • economic prosperity
  • healthcare system
  • education system
  • cultural diversity
  • policy decisions
What to do next:
Look at other essays: