Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and haave health problems a as a result. Why do many working people not get enough exercise? What can be done about the problem?

#people #exercise #time #haave #health

Nowadays, working

people

are not willing to do

exercise

for many reasons. It might be involved long working

hours

or a recent COVID-19 situation. We are aware of lacking

exercise

can lead to health issues in the future. Let us elaborate in the below paragraphs in more detail.

Basically

Add a comma

,Basically

show examples

people

need to work longer

hours

which is compared with the past few decades. Currently, smartphones and notebooks are essential items in

this

20 century. It means we can do our work 24

hours

in 7 days as long as the internet is working. The working environment is shifted from office to

home

if needed. During the pandemic, many companies had introduced work at

home

policies, which make our working

hours

become much more flexible than before, which is not fixed between 9AM to 5PM in the office anymore.

Secondly

people

prefer to stay at

home

during the pandemic. During the COVID-19, governments encouraged

people

need to stay at

home

and the centres were closed for the past 2 years. During the COVID-19 period, most

neighborhoods

Change the spelling

neighbourhoods

show examples

were closed, which forced

people

to need to stay at

home

. They cannot play tennis, or swim.

Thus

people

are getting used to staying at

home

to enjoy Netflix rather than going to

exercise

people

lack practice.

For instance

, working

people

lack

exercise

because of the working environment or habits that have been created in the past 2 years. It leads our immunise system might be weaker compared to

people

who have

exercise

habits. We all know immunise system is a key element to protecting our health.

Therefore

, governments need to promote

exercise

benefits no matter in schools or in advertisements.

For example

, Government can consider providing free access for citizens for a particular period , which can encourage families to use community centres to rebuild their

exercise

routines.

Submitted by ABC_XYZ on Mon May 30 2022

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

305 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Many working people get little or no exercise either during the working day or in their free time, and haave health problems a as a result. Why do many working people not get enough exercise? What can be done about the problem?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In many countries, the amount of crime is increasing. What do you think are the main causes of crime? How can we deal with those causes?

Some people claim that it is acceptable to use animals in medical research for the benefit of human beings, while other people argue that it is wrong. Discuss both views and give your opinion

In some pleces old age is valued, while in other cultures youth is considered more important. discuss both views and give your opinion.

More and more people in developing countries are purchasing cars for the first time. What problems does this cause? What do you think is a possible solution?

As the number of cars increases, more money has to be spent on road systems. Some people think the government should pay for this. Others, however, think that drivers should cover the costs. Discuss both views and give your opinion.