At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Discuss the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

#time #population #countries #adults #people #situation

Nowadays, it is true that the number of young adults in some

countries

is rising

with

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a steady pace and surpassing that of elderly

people

This

causes both pros and cons and I think merits are overcome its demerits. On the one hand, having

the

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great number of youths

have

Correct subject-verb agreement

has

show examples

many advantages

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for

show examples

countries

and one of the chief ones is that the more young

people

countries

have, the more gross domestic product can be manufactured since the young ones have so much stamina and energy.

Therefore

, the economy of those

countries

will be risen together along with the GDP.

Also

, young

people

have so

much

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many

show examples

creativity and thinking skills as they are at

the

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their

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peak year of the human.

Then

, they can innovate

many

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much

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new

technology

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technologies

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that can enhance the standard

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of livings

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livings

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living

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of humans.

On the other hand

, it can be said that crimes are mostly

comitted

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committed

by young

people

because they have little

knowledges

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knowledge

pieces of knowledge

bits of knowledge

show examples

about what is

worng

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wrong

or right and they

maybe

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may be

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not

well

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be well

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educated enough in schools.

However

this

case can be solved by adding courses about

ethic

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ethics

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and

moral

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morals

show examples

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Correct your spelling

curriculum

curriuclum

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the curriuclum

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of school.

Moreover

, young adults lack the

knowledges

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knowledge

pieces of knowledge

bits of knowledge

show examples

and

experiences

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experience

show examples

compared to the old

people

so they will not perform well in works like politics which need a lot of determinants that are based on life experiences.

Furthermore

, the problem with the

youngs

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young

show examples

are

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overconfidence and some of them are egocentric

people

who think they are the centre of the universe. In a nutshell, I pen down saying that if

countries

have more young adults,they will most likely

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apply

show examples

have more advantages than disadvantages and some of

Correct your spelling

the

outdraws can be solved by simple ways.

Submitted by ivvitest3 on Tue May 31 2022

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
26Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

281 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

demographic
workforce
productivity
innovation
skilled labor
social development
technology
dividend
competition
resources
social welfare
unrest
instability
healthcare
elderly care

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At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Discuss the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

It is argued that mobile phones and other electronic devices have no place in the classroom. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view?

Some people believe that violence in the media, such as in television programs and films, directly results in violent behaviour. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Popular events like the World Cup and other international sporting occasions are essential in easing international tensions and releasing patriotic emotions in a safe way to what extend do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

In many countries plastic shopping bags are the main source of rubbish, causing pollution on land and in the water, so people think they should be banned. To what extent do you agree or disagree?