In some cultures, childrenare often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Is it right to tell
children
they can achieve anything by trying hard? In some cultures,
children
are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. Giving
this
message to them can produce several effects on each child.
In
Change preposition
From
show examples
social
Correct article usage
a social
show examples
point of view, telling
this
to
children
is very important because we are motivating the child not to give up. We are making him
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
try hard,
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
make an effort,
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
read between lines and at the end of that long path achieve their objectives. Telling that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough, we are
in other words
that things are not so simple or easy but they are not impossible, is all about working hard
doing
Correct word choice
and doing
show examples
our best. Sometimes
this
is not helpful because we
not
Add a missing verb
do not
show examples
always achieve our dreams or goals but it does not mean we did not try hard, it was just because another person
deserve
Correct subject-verb agreement
deserves
show examples
it more than us. So,
although
we try hard, there are other factors playing a role in our path.
Change preposition
From in
show examples
In
Correct your spelling
An
show examples
economic point of view, if our objectives demand a lot of money, we are again in the same situation,
although
we work hard, it would be difficult to achieve it. To sum up, we are teaching
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
children
how life work, it demands hard work, effort, dedication, time doing things we don't like, studying and attitude. And
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
the end, if you have done all these things but you still did not achieve your goal, you will be happy because you did your best.
Submitted by topcu.bahar on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: