IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people think that child care centres provide the best services for children of pre school age.other working parents think that family members such as grand parents will be better careers for their kids.discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #child #care #centres #services #children #pre #school #age #parents #members #careers #kids
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Some individuals hold the
opinion
Use synonyms
 that both parents are working nowadays. So
grandparents
Use synonyms
 have to take
care
Use synonyms
 of their young ones, whereas others say that child
care
Use synonyms
centres
Use synonyms
 are the best place for their
children
Use synonyms
 while they are working. Every individual has their own
opinion
Use synonyms
 based on their interest. I will discuss both perspectives in subsequent paragraphs and will give my
opinion
Use synonyms
 at the end. On the one hand, there are some reasons why
people
Use synonyms
 say that most parents choose their
children
Use synonyms
 with
grandparents
Use synonyms
.
Firstly
Linking Words
, elderly
people
Use synonyms
 would give more
care
Use synonyms
 than a
childcare
Use synonyms
care
Use synonyms
 centre. So,
children
Use synonyms
 would learn basic values from
grandparents
Use synonyms
. They bathed, fed and read books to
children
Use synonyms
 in
this
Linking Words
, way the relationship between aged
people
Use synonyms
 and teenagers became stronger. According to a survey by The Times of India, 50% of the grandchildren like to spend time with their
grandparents
Use synonyms
.
Grandparents
Use synonyms
 do not suffer from loneliness and depression, which are extremely common at
this
Linking Words
 age.
Besides
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
, some
people
Use synonyms
 advocate that many parents prefer daycare
centres
Use synonyms
 for their
children
Use synonyms
.
Children
Use synonyms
 would learn Education and social skills in
childcare
Use synonyms
centres
Use synonyms
.
Childcare
Use synonyms
centres
Use synonyms
 are run by professionals, who know the needs of
children
Use synonyms
.
For instance
Linking Words
, A study found that
grandparents
Use synonyms
 are very old, so that’s why they do not provide adequate Educational and social skills to their
children
Use synonyms
. In
this
Linking Words
, way studies suggest that child
care
Use synonyms
centres
Use synonyms
 are best. In my
opinion
Use synonyms
,
grandparents
Use synonyms
 do not give good
childcare
Use synonyms
 providers because of their poor health and because they are too old. Infant child
care
Use synonyms
 is challenging for
grandparents
Use synonyms
. In
this
Linking Words
 way, I consider the daycare
centres
Use synonyms
 are the best place for young ones. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 grandparent
care
Use synonyms
 is good in many ways,
childcare
Use synonyms
centres
Use synonyms
 provide Excellent
care
Use synonyms
 for
children
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by Gurleenkaur1145 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: