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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people think that employers should not be concerned about how employees dress at work, but the quality of work only. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #employers #employees #dress #work #quality
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In today’s world, employers usually emphasize a special costume for dressing in each
company
Use synonyms
. It’s widely believed that the way
employees
Use synonyms
 dress affects the environment of the organization they
work
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 in. On the other side, some experts might believe that only the
quality
Use synonyms
 of
work
Use synonyms
 should be in the concerned zone in each
company
Use synonyms
;
however
Linking Words
, I think that these elements will result in a
company
Use synonyms
’s success if they are implemented together. In the following paragraphs, we will analyze mentioned concerns to reach a useful conclusion. It is widely believed among employers that special uniform results in more discipline in each
company
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. Special uniform in each
company
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 makes the workforce believe that they belong to a major portion.
Thus
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 feeling leads them to
work
Use synonyms
 with patience and proficiency. Based on recent research, in
companies
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 with uniforms,
employees
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 tend to spend more time at the organization as overtime
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
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.
In addition
Linking Words
, in
companies
Use synonyms
 that have special clothes for each section,
employees
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 feel a more friendly environment. Simultaneously, some people argue that the only reason
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 each employee’s activity in a
company
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,
Remove the comma
apply
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 is just to help that to gain more profits. In fact, the better we
work
Use synonyms
 for an organization, the better results it will have in its commercial and industrial investments. In some
companies
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, managers focus on the ways that lead their workforce to become more effective.
For example
Linking Words
, it is seen that in Google
company
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, which is one of the most successful
companies
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of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the world,
employees
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 are free to choose their
work
Use synonyms
 time, they have the right to rest whenever they want, and they are provided with a wide range of hobbies in their
work
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 environment. It clarifies that the importance of
work
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quality
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 is the
first
Linking Words
 concern of Google’s managers. A
company
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’s profit might be the direct consequence of
Use synonyms
work
Correct article usage
the work
show examples
quality
Use synonyms
 of its
employees
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;
Linking Words
However
Fix capitalization
however
show examples
, it should not be neglected that the
quality
Use synonyms
 of the outcome is a result of discipline in each
company
Use synonyms
. As it is mentioned before, having a predefined uniform in a
company
Use synonyms
, helps it to reach
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
an acceptable level
discipline
Change preposition
of discipline
show examples
.
Thus
Linking Words
, these elements are connected to each other like a chain so that we can not neglect one of them while we consider another one. In conclusion, while some employers emphasize official costume and others
Add a missing verb
are concern
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concern
Wrong verb form
concerned
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 about
work
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quality
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, I believe that these elements are connected to each other and lead a
company
Use synonyms
 to success whenever implemented simultaneously.
Submitted by mehrad.aghaei on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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