IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people say that protecting the environment is the government’s responsibility. Others believe that every individual should be responsible for it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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There has been a difference of opinion regarding the responsibility of
Use synonyms
environment
Replace the word
environmental
show examples
 protection. There is a view that it is the government’s obligation and others think that each of the citizens has to work for its protection. From my perspective, both of those opinions are equally important.
Firstly
Linking Words
, the nation is always responsible to maintain the ecosystem because it has the right to formulate the constitution that everyone has to follow.
For example
Linking Words
, the state has the right to punish anyone who does illegal actions
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the surrounding
environment
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as cutting trees, hunting animals, littering, etc.
Secondly
Linking Words
, the government has financial resources to invest in modern methods, machinery and equipment
such
Linking Words
 as water purification technology, renovate contaminated land or produce more products including food,
household
Correct word choice
and household
show examples
 appliances that are more environmentally friendly.
Last
Linking Words
 but not least, they can
also
Linking Words
 call for help from international friends and encourage people to contribute to environmental protection. Maintaining and protecting the
environment
Use synonyms
 is a big issue that
affecting
Wrong verb form
affects
show examples
 the world, so
in addition
Linking Words
 to the government of the countries, it is
also
Linking Words
 the duty of each citizen. Start with leading an eco-friendly lifestyle:
reduce
Wrong verb form
reducing
show examples
 plastic use, do not littering, sorting properly, and
use
Wrong verb form
using
show examples
 public transport…
Furthermore
Linking Words
, people can propaganda and
raising
Wrong verb form
raise
show examples
 public awareness of the environmental problems through campaigns or boycott companies that have
detrimental
Add an article
a detrimental
show examples
impact
Fix the agreement mistake
impacts
show examples
 on the
environment
Use synonyms
. These actions seem very small, but meaningful and effective in reducing harm to the
environment
Use synonyms
, saving thousands of lives, creating jobs and helping so many people around the world. In conclusion, protecting and maintaining the
environment
Use synonyms
 should be the responsibility and obligation of everyone including the government and every individual.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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