IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people believe that companies should manufacturing products that last for a long time. Others feel that the emphasis should be place on producing goods that are cheap. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In the modern era, the mass production of
goods
Use synonyms
 plays a significant role in the manufacturing industries.
Therefore
Linking Words
, a fair amount of industry experts believe that producing the
goods
Use synonyms
 in bulk will be an advantage
to save
Change preposition
in saving
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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cost
Fix the agreement mistake
costs
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 and
sell
Wrong verb form
selling
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 the
goods
Use synonyms
 at low prices. I would like to discuss and express my opinion on the given statement.
Firstly
Linking Words
, being a customer we always wanted to have good quality material.
In addition
Linking Words
, we would accept and purchase despite the high cost in the market.
Secondly
Linking Words
, If the companies can make a
product
Use synonyms
 for a long time of benefits
then
Linking Words
, everyone will try to buy that item only.
Therefore
Linking Words
, the company's revenue will increase when compared to its competitor's profit.
For example
Linking Words
, iPhone is one of the best products in the industry and it has a long span of life.
Hence
Linking Words
, their market share is very strong in the mobile industry. As per recent Google survey findings, 95% of customers would prefer to buy the best quality products which are going to provide longer services.
However
Linking Words
, undoubtedly, there are certain categories of customers who would like to buy very cheap products. If the companies
decided
Wrong verb form
decide
show examples
 to produce the
product
Use synonyms
 at a low payment
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
then
Linking Words
, the entire middle and low-income groups people will plan to buy the best price material only as they cannot
effort
Verb problem
afford
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 to buy high fare value materials. How can we expect a Mac or iPhone in a poor family?
On the other hand
Linking Words
, they cannot buy
such
Linking Words
 luxury items in their life.
Hence
Linking Words
, it is nice to have
goods
Use synonyms
 at a cheap amount.
To sum up
Linking Words
, no matter what kind of
product
Use synonyms
 it is. If the quality and cost are fine
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
everyone will buy without any second thought and nobody will think about the
product
Use synonyms
 life span and price as well.

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task achievement
Improve the introduction to clearly outline your main points and state your opinion.
coherence cohesion
Use linking words and clear paragraphs to improve the flow of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Make sure each paragraph clearly supports the main idea you are discussing.
task achievement
You provided relevant examples to support your ideas, like the iPhone and market preferences.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • sustainability
  • carbon footprint
  • customer satisfaction
  • brand loyalty
  • cost-effective
  • replacement expenses
  • environmental impact
  • accessibility
  • innovation
  • variety
  • upfront costs
  • long-term investment
  • consumer behavior
  • market competition
  • affordability
  • frequent updates
  • short-term gains
  • maintenance expenses
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