Many people think that more money will make them happier. How important is money for happiness?

#people #money #happiness

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According to

Linking Words

some

people

Use synonyms

, the degree of happiness is directly related to the amount of

money

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someone has. A few reasons for the importance of

money

Use synonyms

will be discussed in

this

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essay. To start with, when the individual has more than enough wealth, his mind would be at peace because the sense of capability to accommodate his basic needs to himself and his family will leave him with no worries.

For example

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, availability of food, payment of rent or any shelter and providing good clothes.

Thus

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, a life is free of the stress that would disturb someone's mood.

Moreover

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, the reaction to emergencies would

affect

Wrong verb form

be affected

show examples

by the amount of funds available. In fact, the decisions that

make

Wrong verb form

are made

show examples

through hard times and the speed of the responses will

affect

Wrong verb form

be affected

show examples

as well. To illustrate, when someone needs health care in a short time, the choice of the best private hospital depends on the financial support present.

Hence

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, more

money

Use synonyms

means

healthier

Correct article usage

a healthier

show examples

life with no delay in any treatment required.

Finally

Linking Words

, the sense of helping other poor citizens

increase

Correct subject-verb agreement

increases

show examples

when salary

excessing

Verb problem

exceeds

show examples

the normal limit for the reason that donation usually brings satisfaction because the donated person helped other

people

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For instance

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, charity to any orphanages or foundations.

This

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, in turn, results in the unity of a community when rich residents

feels

Change the verb form

feel

show examples

the struggles of the poor

people

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To conclude

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, more

money

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usually brings happiness

along with

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it because

people

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will be able to live a relaxed life, with better health and the sense to help others.

Submitted by Simsima161 on Sun Jun 12 2022

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task response

Improve the clarity and relevance of examples to support the main points.

coherence and cohesion

Enhance the organization of the essay by clearly stating the thesis in the introduction and summarizing the main points in the conclusion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

254 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

subjective
universally
cultural differences
psychological factors
satisfaction with life
emotional balance
personal achievements
social connections
fulfilling relationships
sense of belonging
sense of purpose
physical health
well-being
financial stability
mindfulness
gratitude
positive thinking

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Many people think that more money will make them happier. How important is money for happiness?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some parents think that childcare centres provide the best services for children of preschool age. Other working parents think that family members such as grandparents are better caregivers for their young children. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

You are working for an international company and you would like to request time off for a family event. Write a letter to your boss Explaining what the celebration is Asking for the time off Explaining how you can get work done when you take time off

Many people say the gap between rich and poor people is wider, as rich people become richer and poor people grow poorer. What problems could this situation cause? What measures can be done to address those problems?

Some people believe that it is the responsibility of individuals to take care of their own health and diet. Others however believe that governments should make sure that their citizens have a healthy diet. Discuss both views and give your opinion.