Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programs. For example the neighborhood or teaching to younger children. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

I
Correct pronoun usage
It
show examples
has been suggested that high schools
to
Remove the particle
apply
show examples
be involved with the community
services
by exerting it in programs.
However
, some schools and colleges had already added voluntary work for
students
. I strongly support the idea and will illustrate
further
Correct pronoun usage
it further
show examples
in
this
essay
by
Change preposition
with
show examples
different examples. Apart from
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
education, there are numerous
skills
that a student needs to learn in his teenage.
For instance
, communication, managerial, and
time
management
skills
. One can not just learn these
skills
being a part of community
services
but
also
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
use them in practical life. To elucidate, currently, most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the youngsters waste their
time
by watching
Television
Fix capitalization
television
show examples
, using social networking sites and unnecessary
us
Correct your spelling
use
show examples
if internet.
Therefore
, being
Add an article
a volunteer
show examples
volunteer
Fix the agreement mistake
volunteers
show examples
in
such
services
those
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
can utilize their
time
properly by learning from people, helping others and
consequently
implement
Wrong verb form
implementing
show examples
in
Correct pronoun usage
it in
show examples
their
Correct your spelling
own
show examples
ow
Correct your spelling
own
show examples
lives as well. Moving on, once the youngsters are bound to perform work with charitable organizations, they will get an opportunity to think creatively in their other projects. Those
skills
will
also
create a great impression by mentioning
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their CVs.
Further
,
students
will get to know the value of money and spend wisely
instead
in
Change preposition
of in
show examples
a
Change the article
an
show examples
extravagant way.
Moreover
,
healthy
Correct article usage
a healthy
show examples
Correct your spelling
lifestyle
show examples
life style
Correct your spelling
lifestyle
show examples
has been strongly recommended by health
centers
Change the spelling
centres
show examples
. So, keeping the
students
busy in extracurricular activities makes them fit and energetic.
Additionally
, it could
also
help them to restrain from unhealthy activities or ideas that can be dangerous to themselves and society.
In contrast
, in
humankind
Add a comma
,humankind
show examples
there are
such
persons exists who oppose
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the idea because they believe
students
should focus on their studies
instead
of wasting
time
by joining community
services
centers
Change the spelling
centres
show examples
. In conclusion, I believe
this
would be
great
Add an article
a great
show examples
idea and soon would be
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
part of high
schools
Fix the agreement mistake
school
show examples
or
colleges
Change the noun form
college
show examples
programs.
Submitted by usman.javed on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: