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Many people go to university for academic study. More people should be encouraged to do vocational training because there is a lack of qualified workers such as electricians and plumbers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #university #study #lack #workers #electricians #plumbers
Nowadays, many
people
 accept that academic knowledge at
university
 should be
recieved
Correct your spelling
received
 more priority than
vocational
Add an article
a vocational
show examples
 training
course
Fix the agreement mistake
courses
show examples
. While I concede that studying an academic
course
 could bring about enormous and positive advantages to society, I believe that enhancing the qualities of manual
works
Replace the word
workers
show examples
such
 as electricians and plumbers should
also
 be improved. On the one hand, there
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 a variety of
reason
Fix the agreement mistake
reasons
show examples
 why
people
 should enter high education. One reason is that graduated
students
 from
university
 or college may have more
oppotunity
Correct your spelling
opportunity
 to get highly-paid jobs or to get better positions than the ones from vocational
trainning
Correct your spelling
training
 courses. They are likely to acquire professional knowledge which
help
Change the verb form
helps
show examples
 them to obtain particular accomplishment in their jobs.
Moreover
, studying at
university
 give
students
 more chance to expand their social relationship. Take economic
students
 for an example, the corporate
intership
Correct your spelling
internship
 during the period of their learning process
take
Correct subject-verb agreement
takes
show examples
 them to a lot of companies,
Correct your spelling
organizations
organizationes
Correct word choice
and organizationes
show examples
 where they can have the direct interaction with their major’s successful
people
.
On the other hand
, nobody can deny the need for vocational training.
Firstly
, In term of
Correct article usage
the times
show examples
times
Fix the agreement mistake
time
show examples
 for completing vocational courses, it
take
Change the verb form
takes
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
less
two
Change preposition
than two
show examples
 times rather than
those
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
from ordinary colleges or
university
. Indeed, in many countries,
this
 is the more
convinient
Correct your spelling
convenient
 path which
help
Change the verb form
helps
show examples
people
 early to earn money to make ends meet.
Secondly
, there are a number of
students
 who do not have connate
elevent
Correct your spelling
event
relevant
eleventh
 to join traditional academic environment. The chances for them to be trained in whatever they want are really
neccessary
Correct your spelling
necessary
. In conclusion, the choice
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
vocational
Add an article
a vocational
the vocational
show examples
course
 or academic
course
 is depend. Both cognitive and manual skills are necessary for different parts of our life. The development for all of
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
 aspects should be considered carefully
Submitted by lehao2306 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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