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Writing Samples
Band 5

Computers are being used more and more in education. Some people say that this is a positve trend, while others argue that this is leading to negative consequences. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#computers #education #people #positve #trend #consequences
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There are those who believe that
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the used
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used
Change the form of the verb
use
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 of
computers
 has drawbacks in
education
.
Nevertheless
, others opposed
this
 view and say that
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the used
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used
Replace the word
use
show examples
 of the device has benefits in teaching. Those who support the view that the
used
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use
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 of
desktop
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desktops
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 or
laptop
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laptops
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in
education
 is helping
people
 to be updated on current events and lessons. It is considered convenient in using
this
 tool of
education
 because of accessibility of information is within their fingertips.
Students
 can do the research and do their assignments with the use of
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a website
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website
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websites
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 like Google. Aside from that,
people
 can
also
 access the internet in the comfort of their home like Youtube wherein they can learn new skills or additional knowledge not being taught
from
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in
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 the school.
On the other hand
, there are
people
 who
thinks
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think
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 that computer has
detrimental
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a detrimental
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 effect because
students
 are isolated in their home. There is no social interaction between teachers and
students
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
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 can lead to depression.
Students
 do not learn how to communicate with other
people
 because of
computers
.
In addition
, the continuous use of the device has
bad
Correct article usage
a bad
show examples
 effect
to
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on
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 their eyes. On top of that, the health of the
students
 is affected in
such
 a way that they do not have
the
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apply
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physical activity as they are only in front of the
computers
.
Moreover
,
people
 forget to use the library in reviewing their lessons and
students
 are not keen
of
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on
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 reading books. In summary,
although
computers
 have
negative
Add an article
a negative
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 effect on the health of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
, I strongly believe that using of desktop or laptop in
education
 is beneficial to
students
.
Submitted by joseth_cabanos on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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