IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

some people think that humans can use animals in any way for their own benefits. others, however, believe that people should not use animals in the wrong way. discuss both this views and give your own opinion.

#people #humans #animals
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It is argued that
animals
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 can be misused by
humans
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 for their own benefits while others think that
animals
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 must not be mistreated.ln my opinion,
animals
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 must be taken
care
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 of at all
the
Correct article usage
apply
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Correct your spelling
times
time
mess
tmes
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times
.
This
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 essay will discuss the views and give reasons for my opinion.
Firstly
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, mistreating
animals
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 is a crime in most parts of the world and it is
also
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 cruelty.
Animals
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 are known to be human friendly but sometimes when they are mistreated they get violent and attack
humans
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 , for
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instance
intance
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instance
, dogs are mostly domesticated but they do bite people in so many cases due to people's
behaviors
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behaviours
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 towards them,
addition
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add
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 some cruel individuals do not even feed and
care
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 for the
animals
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 but misuse their abilities.
Secondly
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,
although
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 l believe that
animals
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 need to be cared for , some
humans
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 believe that
animals
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 are to be used only for their
benefits
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benefit
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, they feel it is a waste of money and time to take
care
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 of a non _human thing,
for example
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, in some parts of the world a donkey is used for farming, and some other domestic work
hence
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 it is not given food and
care
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, the animal is expected to find its own food and water,
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moreover
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,moreover
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 some of these donkeys are beaten during the process of farming whereby they get hurt . To sum up,
animals
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 have feelings just like
humans
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 so it is necessary for them to get love and
care
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not
Add the particle
tonot
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 be abused in the process
of
Change preposition
for
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 people's
benefits
Fix the agreement mistake
benefit
show examples
.
Submitted by Kally199226 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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