IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 8

Some people think that the government should invest more money in teaching science than other subjects to make progress. Do you agree or disagree?

#people #government #money #science #subjects #progress
It has become vital to understand the advancement in the areas of technology and science to survive in
this
 contemporary. A vast majority of the people debate that authorities to spare a higher budget to enhance scientific
knowledge
 than other subjects.
However
, I will partially agree with
this
 statement and the following paragraphs will be providing additional information about the same.
Firstly
, there are several benefits to the person who is good at science and technology in
this
 fast-growing world as it enables
such
 a person to correlate the changes happening around him easily.
In addition
 to that, that man thinks of solutions too much faster. For example, an individual who got excellent proficiency in mechanical engineering may fix various home appliances without dependency on others.
Similarly
, software professionals resolve all computer-related problems easily and provide you with a direction at least to fix the issue if they cannot restore themselves. The reason behind all these is skills one acquired in the areas of science and technology.
However
, I believe acquiring
knowledge
 in other areas is
also
 equally significant because of the following reasons. Since different content of the information makes humans consider various things into account while focusing on the development of the discipline.
For example
, a basic idea about the environment and the importance of safeguarding is going to be very crucial for everyone in
this
 world.
Moreover
, the primary
knowledge
 about all other curriculums is going to help us to communicate with the people from different states and nations. Along with all these, competencies in different subjects will enhance the memory power and brain function too as per the reports. In conclusion, focusing on a single subject may have several advantages,
however
, having
knowledge
 of all other subjects will lead to a balance in life.
Submitted by simhagouroju on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: