IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people think that it is good to raise children in a city. Others argue that it is better for children to grow up in the countryside.

#people #children #city #countryside
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There are some
people
Use synonyms
 who side with the notion of upbringing
children
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 in urban areas, while some argue that
countryside
Correct article usage
the countryside
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 is
better
Correct article usage
a better
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 place in terms of youngster rearing. Cities with their better amenities can be an optimal place, whereas villages surrounded by pure nature are more
favorable
Change the spelling
favourable
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 for
child raising
Add a hyphen
child-raising
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. It is true that urban areas are known for their wide range of facilities for various fields. Take education as an example, which plays an essential part in the life of young
people
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. In turn, there might not be professional teachers in every part of the cities but there are a lot of far
better equipped
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better-equipped
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 schools with technical resources for
children
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's
advantages
Fix the agreement mistake
advantage
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. Studying in comfortable places and being able to use most technical facilities lead youngsters to acquire knowledge faster. When it comes to the countryside, it is mostly free from various
pullutions
Correct your spelling
pollutions
 which can be detrimental to all
people
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.
Although
Linking Words
children
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 have fewer chances for better education they are less likely to be afflicted by exhausted fumes.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, conditions in rural areas make
children
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 more endurable to many unexpected situations in the future. Because villages are virtually not comfortable enough in many spheres,
that is
Linking Words
 why having lived under harsher conditions young
people
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when
Correct word choice
who
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they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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grow up, easily adapt to most
unfavorable
Change the spelling
unfavourable
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 conditions. In conclusion,
city
Add an article
the city
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 is good
for
Change preposition
apply
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with its facilities, while I think
countryside
Correct article usage
the countryside
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Add the comma(s)
, where is free from pollution,
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where
Correct word choice
which
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 is free from pollution is an ideal place for
child raising
Add a hyphen
child-raising
show examples
.
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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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