Today our communications, medicine and transport systems all depend on computer technology. Our reliance on computer technology in these fields has created a dangerous situation. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

Today our communications, medicine and transport
system
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systems
show examples
all depend on computer technology. Our reliance on computer technology in the fields has created a dangerous situation. In modern world life of people is busy which requires
an
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a
show examples
modern
approch
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approach
for their
day today
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day-today
show examples
activities.
Therefore
assit
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assist
of
artifitial
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artificial
interligence
Correct your spelling
intelligence
or in some other words,
help
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the help
show examples
of
computers
are essential for
Add a hyphen
day-today
show examples
day
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the day
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today activities like transport, medicine and communication.
As
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For
show examples
examples
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example
show examples
proper route management
system
for transport and a well
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managed
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manged
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managed
show examples
database for medicine and new technologies for communication can be
mention
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mentioned
show examples
.
However
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,However
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If
computers
stop for an instant what will happen? It is hard to
Correct your spelling
imagine
immagine
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imagine
the situation
might
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that might
show examples
Correct your spelling
occur
occurs
occure
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occur
in
such
situation
Correct article usage
a situation
show examples
. If
computers
Correct your spelling
stopped
show examples
stoped
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stopped
show examples
working the whole
system
managed by the
computers
would stop their functionalities. For
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
example
Add a comma
,example
show examples
if
computers
stop a train
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transportation
tranportation
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transportation
system
managed by the
computers
will be collapsed. The
informations
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information
pieces of information
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like
location
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the location
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of trains, train
shedules
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schedules
, information
of
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about
show examples
passenger
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passengers
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will not be
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accessible
accesible
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accessible
and due to that whole
system
could be collapsed.
Computers
are machines and machines can stop
any
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at any
show examples
time due to many reasons.
Main
Add an article
The main
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reason can be a
virres
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virus
attack
or
attack
from a
hakker
Correct your spelling
hacker
.
Virres
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Viruses
affect the functions of a computer
system
and
distrupt
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disrupt
the normal working methods. Hackers will
sneek
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sneak
seek
through security protocols and
effect
Correct your spelling
affect
show examples
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
system
procedures. Now a day there are
lot
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a lot
show examples
of
terorist
Correct your spelling
terrorist
activities and these issues can be due to cyber terrorism. As
a
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an
show examples
example
Add a comma
,example
show examples
cyber
attack
to
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on
show examples
england
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England
show examples
interligent
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intelligent
intelligence
service which
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
Correct your spelling
happened
happend
Correct your spelling
happened
on few
Correct your spelling
years
yeras
Correct your spelling
years
back can be identified. Due to the
attack
Add a comma
,attack
show examples
some high classified files were taken by the terrorists. In
conclusion
Add a comma
,conclusion
show examples
even
we
Correct word choice
if we
show examples
requires
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require
show examples
the assistance of technology, we should not 100%
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relies
relied
relie
Correct your spelling
rely
on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
computers
. There should always
a
Add a missing verb
be a
show examples
backup plan.
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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • reliance
  • cybersecurity
  • over-reliance
  • digital divide
  • data breach
  • cyberbullying
  • diagnostic machines
  • electronic health records
  • automated vehicles
  • predictive maintenance
  • real-time monitoring
  • vulnerability
  • misinformation
  • hacking
  • efficiency
  • navigation systems
  • traditional skills
  • system failures
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